Wilderness Thoughts

Epiphany III

2012-01-19T18:33:00.003-07:00

As Jesus passed along by the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew casting a net into the sea - for they were fishermen. And Jesus said to them, "Follow me and I will make you fish for people." And immediately they left their nets and followed him. As he went a little farther, he saw James son of Zebedee and his brother John, who were in their boat mending the nets. Immediately he called them; and they left their father Zebedee in the boat with the hired men, and followed him.

Jesus was walking along the Sea of Galilee where the fishing boats came in and out. This wasn't a secluded beach on a lazy summer afternoon, this was during the busy part of the work day along the piers, with the crazy hubbub and pungent odor of a busy wharf. Out of the noise and sweat of their busiest time, Jesus called his disciples.

I like to think of Jesus coming to me in quiet prayer as I kneel in church or sit in my wing back chair in the study. I try to block the noise of life so I can really listen to God's voice. This is a good thing and even Jesus needed his quiet time with God. But I wonder how many times Jesus has walked by me during my busiest time of day, stopped and called my name, and I didn't hear him. Is it once a month? Once a week? How about every day? No matter where I am or what I'm doing, Jesus is always standing by and beckoning me to follow him. And I, more likely than not, don't pay him any attention. Too much going on, too much noise for me to respond to Christ's call. Maybe later, when I'm back in the wing back chair. Maybe then I'll jump up and follow him. But then again, its been a long day and I'm tired. Maybe tomorrow Jesus. I'm sure I'll go immediately, tomorrow.

Taking time to pray

2011-09-25T07:56:00.002-06:00

This blog began as a spiritual exercise, an open reflection on what I see God doing in me and the world about me. I reflect upon readings from the daily office, books, articles TV shows and movies. As I "read" my life, I reflect back on what I've noticed, a Lectio Divina of the book of my life.

Based on my lack of postings, I have to admit I haven't done much life reading lately. I'm too busy doing life to spend time reflecting on it and praying through it. That is a sad commentary. I put in long hours at work, at the theater and in community work, so when I get home I just want to sit with my significant other and "be". We all need time to "veg" and relax. So when do I make the time to reflect? Without reflection and prayer it become too easy to separate what I do from my relationship with God. The spiritual work is not only as important as the other work, but actually more important. It is the spiritual work that informs everything else I do. It is the battery that keeps the ministry going. Without the spiritual dimension, I might as well be working at a widget factory. So then, why is it so hard to keep up?

The reason is that even though my heart knows its valuable, my head says, "Keep busy." The world, and thus me because I am part of the world, says we have to produce. I have to not only "be" busy, but look busy. I can't say no to assignments because someone has to do them and I can't let them fail. Failure would reflect poorly on my ability. But not doing everything is not a failure. Saying no when asked to take on one more task is not letting people down. Maintaining strict times of prayer and reflection is not putting off work. The real work of pastoral care is keeping grounded with the real pastor, Christ.

My advice to myself is to slow down. Schedule times to reflect, journal and process what is happening around me. If I can't "BE" with God, how can I be with others in God's name?

Evolve or die

2011-08-12T12:20:00.005-06:00

All I learned about dinosaurs I learned from Jurassic Park. Well that's not exactly true, I remember learning about them way back in elementary and junior high school. But things have changed. The ever popular brontosaurus who lumbered along dragging his giant tail is no longer even a dinosaur. What we once thought of as the brontosaurus is now called the Apatosaurus and apparently they never dragged their tales. The tales were upright and provided balance.

What I did learn from Jurassic Park is the theory that not all dinosaurs became extinct but merely evolved into something else, birds. Yep, Velocoraptors and the modern day birds of prey, Raptors, are distant cousins. That means the swift moving and mobile eagles, hawks, owls and falcons used to be lumbering dinosaurs! Now that's what I call adapting.

This morning I took communion to one of our home-bound members. As we talked about the church and its future she remarked, "Well, I guess I'm just a dinosaur, but that's all right because its too late for me to change." As we talked I started envisioning the Church as a dinosaur, lumbering along, dragging its tail waiting for the asteroid to hit. But the more I thought about it, I realized the Church doesn't have to become extinct. Instead, we can actually evolve. "

"Wait a minute, pastor, your talking about change. Can't fool me."

You are right, I am talking about change and we all know change is long hard work and its painful. A Velocoraptor didn't go to sleep one night and wake up an eagle next morning, it took generations and lots of outside pressure. The Church of Christendom isn't going to become a Post-Modern church overnight either. It takes time, effort and the pressure from culture to make it happen. But we have to face the reality, the church must evolve or become extinct. The old model of dinosaur was large and cumberson and limted to the ground. Birds are smaller, nimble and swift and can go just about anywhere. Wouldn't it be great if our churches were more like birds than dinosaurs? Wouldn't it be great to soar as if on eagle's wings? Come on church, what will it be; the tar pits or the clouds?

K.I.S.S.

2011-07-29T12:30:00.002-06:00

I'm sure you know the acronym, "Keep It Simple, Stupid" or KISS for short. Elizabeth Drescher has written a book that puts a slightly different spin on that acronym. I say it is about "Keep It Social, Stupid."

Among my clergy peers I find that I was a bit of an early adapter. I was on Facebook and Twitter while some of my colleagues were bemoaning the fact that being online too much detracted from the work of the church. They saw it as playing around and would make comments such as, "Who cares what you had for lunch. I'm doing real ministry." Well to be clear, one-on-one contact is still very important. When a person is lying in a hospital bed they need more than a Tweet, they need a hand to hold. But, as Elizabeth Drescher points out, online community can be just as real and important as face to face community.

Although I was online fairly early, for my demographic anyway, I realized reading Drescher's book that I had it all wrong. I was using Social Media in much the same way I've used broadcast media in the past. The only difference, I thought, was that this is free. How wrong I was! Drescher makes her case very succinctly that the point of Social Media is just that. Its Social! Facebook, Twitter and even our web pages are not mere bulletin boards where you post what's coming up next week. They are communities designed for dialogue and community. Echoing Drescher, social media is not a tool for promotion, its a place for connecting. It is where we can build relationships and form community, not only with those in proximity with us, but with others across the globe. My current parish has an average Sunday attendance of 48 with a membership of about 130. Our Facebook page as 165 fans with sub-pages for various ministries that combined have 120 fans. Drescher made me keenly aware that I'm not to be talking to my followers, I'm to be engaged with them. That changes everything.

Thanks, Elizabeth, for your research and insight. I will be better at remembering to KISS. Keep it SOCIAL, Stupid.

Jumping to Conclusions

2011-07-25T19:54:00.003-06:00

The first news reports I heard coming out of Norway was, "terrorist bomb hits Oslo." Of course reading the word "terrorist" at first made me think they were Islamic fundamentalists. I jumped to a conclusion.

Then the whole truth started to unfold. Yes, it was indeed a radical fundamentalist that set those bombs and attacked a camp of teenagers, but it wasn't an Islamic fundamentalist, it was a Christian fundamentalist. I felt sick to my stomach. How could someone who believes in the same God as I do, do something so horrible. Then a read a simple comment by a fellow Christian on Facebook. It said, "Now I know how all those peaceful, loving Muslims feel every time one of their radicals blows up a building."

Its so easy to think of "them" and "those people" as if they are different from us. But they aren't. They love their God and their families and their country just like we do. Most Muslims, like most Christians, read their holy book as a guide for peace and justice. Its the few who are on the fringe, the few that are dangerous who wreak havoc.

I feel guilty for jumping to conclusions. I am saddened that innocent people, mostly children, died because of some one's warped religious beliefs. I can't change what has happened, but I can influence the future. I can continue to learn and be open to others, no matter how different they may seem to me on the outside. I can work for healing and reconciliation and call others to join me. Its time to stop jumping.

Answer Me Jesus

2011-07-21T10:03:00.003-06:00

Sitting in my office is a small statue of Jesus that can provide answers to all my questions. All you do is ask a question and then turn the statue upside down and the answer appears. If you ever had a Magic Eight Ball as a child, you get the idea. The statue is filled with colored water and trite answers such as, “Yes, my child” and “Be patient” are printed on a floating device inside. It’s silly and fun and some might even say a bit sacrilegious.

Prayer, after all, is serious business. It requires time, attentive listening, discernment and grounding in Scripture. But, how often is our prayer life more like “Answer Me Jesus” than it is a serious commitment of listening to God? It is so much easier to treat God like a “Magic Eight Ball” or heavenly gumball machine; put in the prayer and out comes an answer; or an omnipotent Santa who gives presents to the good boys and girls, than to spend time developing an honest and deep relationship with God. We live in an instant society. Most of us can not remember life without fast food restaurants, microwaves and instant everything. We can make hundreds of friends on Facebook in a single day, but to really get to know the heart and mind of someone takes time and energy. God asks us to have the same heart and mind as Christ. This involves work, time and commitment. If you are seeking answers from God, it will require more than giving God a little shake and waiting for an immediate answer. It will require you to get to really know God, and once you do, you will already have your answer.

this devotion will appear in the Saturday edition of the Pal-Item newspaper in Richmond, IN

Secular and the Sacred Mind

2011-05-06T08:46:00.003-06:00

Benedictine spirituality is about seeing God in all things at all times. The all pervading presence of God in our lives is like air, we cannot escape it. God is in us and through us and around us. Benedictine spirituality calls us to be aware of God's presence. Author Corinne Ware calls it "resetting" the mind. In her book, "St. Benedict on the Freeway", she cites psychologist Robert Coles and theologian Paul Tillich in their writings on the "secular mind." Ware seems to say that the difference from the secular and the sacred is how we view the situation. You see things differently depending on where you place your focus.

I've been following a lot of blogs and tweets about the death of Osama Bin Laden, particularly the reaction of the American public. There have been quotes from MLK Jr. and Gandhi as well as cheers for getting the job done. I read an interesting article from the New York Times describing the psychological aspect of our celebrations. "It may be not be pretty," it says, "but it's human nature." I understand why people take to the streets and celebrate like their team just won the Super Bowl. It's a war on terror and this is a significant blow. I also understand the legal and political ramifications of capture verses kill. All these arguments and feelings are valid and, like the article said, very human. This is the secular mind.

The sacred mind responds as would Christ. What would Jesus do at the death of a sinner? I think he would go off to a garden and pray to his father in heaven. I think he would be grieved over how much pain and suffering one man could do in the world. I think there would be grief over the reality that we still use killing and force rather than love and understanding.

I have no answer to the question of how we are to respond. I have no answer as to whether Bin Laden is in hell or if love finally won. I have to agree with Rob Bell, "Those are questions, or more accurately, those are tensions we are free to leave fully intact. We don't need to resolve them or answer them because we can't, and so we simply respect them, creating space for the freedom that love requires."

You Can't Handle the Truth

2011-04-15T19:40:00.003-06:00

"You can't handle the truth."

Any movie buff out there will recognize that film quote. It's Jack Nicholson's courtroom speech from A Few Good Men. That quote came to me today as I was reading Rob Bell's book, "Love Wins". Rob opens up the Scripture to show us what to expect from heaven. Revelation 20, John writes people will reign with God. "Reign", Rob points out, is an active verb. We got work to do once we get there. Rob points out in 1 Corinthians 3 that Christ will bring everything to light and reveal it with fire. When the chaff is burned away from wheat, I'm thinking it might not be too comfortable. One of the main points Rob makes about heaven is that its not some far off, pie-in-the-sky vacation wonderland. Its not all sitting on clouds playing harps. Heaven, or "the age to come" as Christ says is about transforming God's creation here on earth into something else. And in order to be ready for the big change, we need to make our own personal change. The sentence that got me thinking of Jack Nicholson was this:

"What we find Jesus teaching, over and over and over again, is that he's interested in our hearts being transformed, so that we can actually handle heaven."

WOW

It's important with Holy Week beginning in just a couple of days for me to remember to keep that foremost in my thoughts. Easter isn't just about getting our ticket to paradise, its about entering into a whole new age here and now. How does Jesus' entry into Jerusalem help transform me? How does breaking bread and washing one an other's feet on Maundy Thursday help me become a person of "peace and justice and worship and generosity"? How does the agony of the cross prepare me to handle heaven? The winnowing fork is prodding me toward the fire of purification even now.

Can I handle the truth of God's reign? I pray, a little more each day.

Part of the herd

2011-04-05T12:48:00.003-06:00

This morning I listened to an interview with Michael Willrich about his book, "Pox; An American History." The book chronicles the forced vacinations of individuals during the small pox epidemic at the turn of the century. Going beyond its implications for public health, Willrich talked about the much broader topic of individual and civil libety. We, as a nation, value independance and our unalienable rights, however we perceive them. What stuck with from that interview was his comment about "herd immunity." In order to block a virus from spreading through a population (herd), that herd had to develop a corporate immunity. The vast majority of the herd had to be safe from infection so that if even a few random individuals contracted the virus, it wouldn't spread to kill off the populaltion. In theory, over time the herd would develop its own immunity. What the vaccine was intended to do was speed up that evolutionary cycle. The main problem Willrich identified, however, is that as people we don't like to see ourselves as part of the herd. We are a collection of individuals. But we are part of a herd, whether that is the human race, our village or our family. We are not isolated individuals, we are all connected to each other. In the church we call this community. We are bound together by God's Holy Spirit. As Christians we are one via our baptism into Christ. We pray every Sunday for Christ to dwell in us and we in Him. Episcopalians, Baptists, Roman Catholics, Quakers, Evangelical Independent Christians and all the rest are one in Christ. Scripture goes even further to say that all are united to God, even those who do not believe. God created all that is and we are to see God in all things and all people. So whether its Christian, Jew, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist or whatever, we are called to be more concerned about US than we are about the ME. "Beloved, let us love one another, becasuse love is from God; everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, for God is love." (1 John 4:7,8) Love your neighbors; the ones next door that annoy and the ones far off you don't know. Love your enemies. Love God's creation. And yes, you are to love yourself because you are a child of God. Just don't love the ME more than you do the US.

A Lenten meditation

2011-03-21T13:18:00.004-07:00

"I don't know him!" As the last echo made its way through the corridors surrounding Caiaphas's courtyard, the cock crowed the arrival of a new day. For Peter, it was the dawning of the worst day of his life. he realized that he'd done the unthinkable. He had denied Jesus.

Peter ran into the darkness, trying to hide himself before the first rays of light could find him. he ran into back alleys and dark corners, but no matter where he ran, he couldn't hide - from himself or from the terrible truth. "Before the cock crows, you will deny me three times," Jesus had said. Peter's quick response burned in his mind, "Never, Lord! I would die first!" How he wished he would. Overcome with despair, Peter stumbled into a back alleyway and collapsed. When he came to, Peter had no idea of how long he had been there. Stumbling to the street, he asked passers-by what had happened. They told him that three criminals had been taken to Golgotha to be crucified. With all the energy he could muster, Peter ran to his friend. But by the time he reached the hill, nearly everyone had gone. he saw Mary and John and a few other women at the foot of Jesus' cross. He wanted to go to his rabbi and friend, but he couldn't He couldn't kneel next to Jesus' mother after denying him. So he stood at a distance - praying for some kind of miracle, some kind of sign, pleading with God, asking "Why?"

Almost in answer to his question, Jesus spoke, "Father, forgive them." Jesus, who had taught his disciples to love their neighbor as themselves, to turn the other cheek, and to walk the extra mile, was asking his father to forgive those who crucified him. Jesus forgave those who whipped him, those who drove the nails in his hand, and those who denied even knowing him. 'I've done the worst thing imaginable," thought Peter, "And Jesus forgives even me." Peter, overwhelmed by Dog's love, dropped to his knees a changed man.

Peter had denied Jesus. he'd declared before a courtyard bustling with people that he had nothing to do with Jesus, his rabbi and his friend. Was his betrayal any worse than that of Judas? They both ran away into the night. Their anguish and shame was so great they both wanted to die. We know that one of them did and one of them didn't. What was the difference? Judas let his sin separate him from God. Peter turned to God with all his brokenness. Peter was able to turn to the cross and , in doing so, to receive the forgiveness of Christ, Peter faced what he'd done. Judas did not.

As you journey with Christ, there will be times when you let him down, deny him, and even betray him. But you have a choice, You can run and hide yourself from God, which ultimately means that you hide from God's love and grace. or you can go to the cross and let Jesus clean the slate. Thought you may still have to live with the consequences of your actions in this world, God's grace released you. Your shame and your guilt will be gone. It will be the dawn of a new day, a new way. From the lenten section of "A Labyrinth Year", Walking to the Cross.

Fullness of Christ in 70 minutes?

2011-03-10T09:18:00.002-07:00

We are called by God to grow into the full stature of Christ. We are to be changed into his (Christ's) likeness. Through our baptismal covenant we promised God that we would continue in the apostles' teaching and fellowship, in the braking of brad, and in the prayers. Our calling as Christians is to grow closer to God and to let that encounter change us.

But how can we be changed into the fullness of Christ in just 70 minutes a week. That is about how long our average Sunday service runs. Assuming a person goes every week and through in Christmas, that's a little over 61 hours a year devoted to religious growth. Compare that to the amount of time the average American spends watching TV in a year; 1,456 hours. Or working, 2,340 hours per year.

So how does one become transformed into the likeness of Christ? Thriving churches are congregations that put more emphasis on small fellowship groups than on Sunday morning worship gatherings. Dan Kimball writes in Emerging Worship, "midweek home gatherings were more important for spiritual formation than the larger weekend gathering. Home gatherings were really the backbone of all we did."

Whether its groups that meet in homes or at church or in coffee shops or even pubs, its the community formed in smaller groups that really help us become like Christ. Its in sharing our stories, being vulnerable, studying Scripture and breaking bread together that shapes us and supports us in our spiritual journey. This Lent, I encourage you to look at ways to form intentional Christian community. Start a home group or seek out a small group already in existence. Make time for what's truly important.

Meaning and Transformation

2011-02-01T14:37:00.002-07:00

I'm reading Ramadan's book on meaning and Dan Kimball's book Emerging Worship. Every once in a while the thoughts cross paths. Kimball reminds his readers that worship, as in Sunday gatherings, is not the main job of the church. The main job is to make disciples. Disciples are made when people encounter God in community, not just by listening to a sermon or hearing a good music program. The Pareto Principle says that 80 percent of results flow from 20 percent of our efforts. That means, 20 percent of the people in a church do 80 percent of the work and giving. It also means that most churches put 80 percent of their energy and money into Sunday morning, which produces about 20 percent return. The real place of transformation takes place not on Sunday morning, but in small groups and house churches and in conversations over coffee.

Chapter 2 in The Quest for Meaning is on the universal. Ramadan writes, "What do we mean by 'universal'? Given that, as we have seen, we are all - each and every one of us - searching for meaning, truth and peace...then where will we place that which is universal in human existence?"

We all seek meaning, truth and peace. We want our lives to mean something, to be grounded and life giving. And where do we find the connection? In community, and not just for an hour a week on Sunday morning, but living connected lives.

Quest for peace

2011-01-28T12:01:00.003-07:00

In first chapter of Ramadan's book takes its name from the book title, "The Quest for Meaning." Here Ramadan lays out the premise that we all seek some sense of meaning in our lives. He begins with the three basic philosophical questions posed by Immanuel Kant; What can I know? What should I do? What may I hope for? Ramadan believes all three questions can be summed up in one; Where do I come from? If we know where we come from, we know our way.

Much of the chapter is about knowing self and how all journeys ultimately lead us back to ourselves. It is by coming to understand who we are and whose we are that gives us meaning. Finally Ramadan says that our search for meaning is really a search for peace. "We are looking for peace: for answers to our questions, for a few certainties beyond our doubts and for solutions to our tensions. The quest for meaning is indeed a quest for peace."

As a pastor, my calling is to preach the Good News to the world. In essence, to bring peace to those who are far off and those who are near. I end each Eucharist with the prayer, "May the peace of God which passes all understanding keep your hearts and minds in the knowledge and love of God and of God's son, Jesus Christ." The mission of the church stated in our catechism is "to restore all people to unity with God and each other in Christ." Restoration of unity, also called reconciliation, is about fostering peace.

How does the church live out its call for peace? The church is to reach out with love, with meaning, with purpose and with peace to an increasingly unchurched and fragmented world. I pray that I may be the kind of christian who can help people in their journey to find meaning and peace.

The Quest for Meaning

2011-01-27T14:20:00.002-07:00

This week I got the privilege of meeting Tariq Ramadan, author, professor and philosopher. I picked up his book The Quest for Meaning; Developing a Philosophy of Pluralism. Over the next few weeks I'll be blogging my thoughts as I read through his book.

In his opening chapter Ramanda writes, "This book is a journey, and an initiation. It is actually about setting out and travelling the paths of the heart, the mind and the imaginary." He rightly asserts that to start such a journey requires us to get past our fears and distrust. We are to step out from behind our window to the world and enter into the center of creation. Ramadan quotes travel writer, Ella Maillard. "The hardest part (of going out) is getting to the station." Indeed, the first steps are the hardest: leaving behind family, friends, habits, comfort, certainty, and setting off for new horizons. This task of venturing forth "takes self-awareness, determination, humility, modesty, curiosity and a certain taste for risk to venture into strange worlds, new references and new vocabularies."

I look back over my life and recall those times I stepped out in search of new shores. Leaving behind the church to venture into the secular world after twenty years of ordained ministry. I was insulated in a Christian world with virtually no contact with those outside the church. I took time off and worked at Starbucks while going back to an old dream of being a professional actor. All of a sudden I was like an alien in a strange land. Everything that I had come to believe about myself was shaken during that time. I embarked on a new venture of self-awareness. During his lecture, Ramadan stated that the first part of coming to God is coming to ourselves.

If we don't risk anything, we will never gain anything. God calls us to go forth into strange worlds and share the Good News of God's love for us. The quest for meaning lies in heeding God's call and taking the risk to step out from behind our doors and windows into the real world.

Spiritual Adulthood

2011-01-11T11:20:00.003-07:00

Joan Chittister writes in The Rule of Benedict; Insights for the Ages that "Prayer, contemplation, and spiritual adulthood don't happen by themselves. We have to work at them."

My first thought on this text was that spiritual adulthood is different from adulthood because we don't have to work at being adult, it just comes with age. The more I reflected, the more I realized there truly isn't a difference. We grow up, that is get older and become "adults" according to the world, but age does not necessarily make us act like adults. All you have to do is to listen to the political machine and the childlike way the two sides sling their mud pies to realize that.

The tragedy in Tuscon once again focuses our attention to how, as a nation, we treat one another. Although the shooting was done by a very disturbed young man, we have to be aware of the toxic society in which we live. The rancor that exists over politics is more than "spirited debate" as our congressman Mike Pence calls it. We are a civilization that is not very civil.

Its time more people started to act like adults. Stop using violent rhetoric like painting cross hairs on our opponents pictures. You may not mean it literally, but some crazy out there just might.

The more we work at it, the more Christ-like we can become. The more Christ-like we are the more likely we will work together to heal our nation.

Longing for community

2010-11-23T10:22:00.002-07:00

Read a blog from cafechurch on the increase of coffee shops in England. Fifty percent of people now spend time at coffee shops while pubs are closing down. The blog cited a study that says 1 out of 10 people in England describe themselves as lonely and that their hectic modern lifestyle inhibits their ability to form community.

This makes me reflect back on the Starbucks experience. Starbucks intentionally seeks to become your "third place." Home is your first place, work is your second place and Starbucks wants to be that place where you spend your time away from home and work. People no longer sit on their front porch and chat up the neighbors. We are too busy for bridge clubs and the Elks, like my parents used to do. We long for community but find ourselves over booked and over stressed.

For generations, church was that third place. It's where you worshipped, but it was also the social center of the local community. In ancient days the local church community provided for social, spiritual and community needs. Not so much anymore. But people still long for community, a place to belong where "everybody knows your name." People also long for meaning and mystery and label themselves as "spiritual but not religious."

We, as the church, are still called to reach out to a lonely world longing for community and meaning. It just may not look the same way it has for the past 100 years. Meeting in a big building on Sunday morning may not be the best way to reach that lonely 10%. Home church, Cafe Church and even Theology Pub are ways to get out our buildings and our comfort zone. The world is only getting more hectic and more frightening, our call as the church is to go out and build community.

WWFD

2010-10-10T14:09:00.003-06:00

What Would Francis Drive?

Leaving church this morning I passed a brand new, shiny black Chevrolet Impala. It's a very nice looking car and was actually a little envious. Then I noticed a bumper sticker on the rear fender, "Happiness is being a Franciscan."

I thought that's more ironic than a Dead Head sticker on a Cadillac. St. Francis of Assisi stripped himself of his wealth, literally standing naked outside the church. So what would Francis drive? Well, Francis would probably walk.

I've read that Francis is probably the most well-known Catholic saint and the least followed. His love of animals and nature is sweet, but his embrace of Holy poverty is another thing. That's the hard work of the Gospel. "Die to self", "Live simply so others can simply live", you get the picture. Now I'm sure the person driving the Impala is a holy person who gives of their time and talent for God's people, I just found it a little funny and it made me think of "what would Francis drive" and Don Henley.

preoccupied

2010-09-25T15:43:00.002-06:00

I get preoccupied. I try to blame it on ADHD or type A personality, but the fact is that when I get going on a project I get tunnel vision. I used to say I was good at multi-tasking, but I've read recent studies that say we can't actually multi-task, we just switch from being intensely focused rapidly between tasks. So its tunnel vision and then all of a sudden a bright shiny object appears and the tunnel vision is refocused.

This was brought home to me today because I called a friend who's been going through some tough times. I care for him and I want good things for him. But it took a mutual friend to remind me that he needed some TLC. So upon her prompting, I called him. It felt good. I wanted to see how he was doing and hear his voice. But why didn't I call sooner and why did I need to be prompted?

I have to admit I even do this as a pastor. I've been working on putting together an interfaith discussion that has required a lot of thought and follow-through. And between writing press releases and newsletter articles and making phone calls, I forget to check in the people who may need to be contacted. Do I not love them? Do I not care what is going on with them? Of course not. I just get preoccupied.

But that can't be an excuse. I say I'll do better, but it happens again. So, the question becomes, how do we form community that holds us up? It can't be the task of one person. It has to be everyone reminding everyone else. Its like a spiderweb, we all need to be connected in some way that no one falls through. That requires all of us to take a part. When my friend told me our mutual friend was hurting, that was being connected. She wasn't chastising me, she was sharing what she knew and asking for help. She knew she couldn't provide for all his care, so she enlisted others to help her. I showed care for both friends when I called. And sometimes, hard as it is to believe, sometimes people need to ask for help. Its no good sitting in pain and keeping score of the folks who DON'T call you. We all lead busy lives and its not that no one cares, but no one can do it alone. Its called being the body of Christ.

Strippers Protest

2010-08-30T09:12:00.003-06:00

There was a front page article in the paper this week. "Strippers protest at Ohio Church." Congregants of New Beginnings Ministries routinely picket the The Fox Hole Strip Club, so the strippers decided that turn-about was fair play. Clad in bikinis, the strippers carried signs saying, "Do unto others as you would have done unto you" and "Jesus love the children of the world."

I have to admit I find some humor in this. I am also terribly saddened. How did the followers of a God of love turn so nasty. What would Jesus have done? Stand outside the strip club shouting at the dancers and patrons? When Jesus saw a crowd about to stone a woman caught in adultery (which was their legal right to do) he said, "He who is without sin cast the first stone." Jesus didn't picket the sinners, he ate with them. The reason being that breaking bread with someone means you are in a relationship with them. Jesus was about healing people and relationships.

With a name like New Beginnings, wouldn't it be great if the congregants brought the strippers lunch instead of pickets? What if they learned the history and story of the people in the club, why they were there, what was going on in their lives, and most importantly, what was missing. Instead of bringing condemnation, they could bring God's healing presence.

My theology says that God is love, not condemnation. The Bible doesn't say God loved us so much that he came to beat the crap out of us. It says he loved us so much that he was willing to suffer humiliation, pain and death to prove he wanted nothing more than a relationship with His children.

Abraham's Children

2010-08-26T13:56:00.002-06:00

The Cathedral of St. John in the Wilderness in Denver, Colorado host the Abrahamic Initiative. The group's mission is to be a place of discussion where Christians, Jews and Muslims can come together and engage in meaningful, relational dialogue. That group has been on my mind a lot lately with all the rhetoric and diatribe about the Islamic Center 2 in lower Manhattan.

Obama spoke against the unconstitutional and hateful messages streaming through the media. The Roman Catholic Archbishop of New York as well as the Episcopal Bishop of New York both came out in defense of the builders of the center. All of them are getting very strong feedback from those in opposition.

For that reason I'm trying to explore the idea of some sort of Abrahamic group in small town, mid-America. Is it possible here, or just at big cathedrals in urban centers? On the plus side, we have a somewhat liberal, private liberal arts school in town. There are courses related to Islam and there are a few Muslim students and faculty. To illustrate the down side, I approached another main line denomination in town to join with me in this endeavor. The pastor was gung-ho, but the congregation wanted nothing to do with it.

I hope stereotypes and misconceptions can give way to deeper understanding and respect. It's my prayer and my hope.

Changes

2010-08-23T07:16:00.003-06:00

If there are still any readers out there, you know I haven't been blogging on this site as much. I've been getting lots of comments, however. All spam.

I tried to host an online Benedictine group on Facebook, but that didn't seem to be the right venue. Now its time to revisit the old blog. I have to admit my routine has changed quite a bit. Living in a relationship does give life a different rhythm than living alone. I'm also doing more acting and rehearsals every evening push other things in life around. All excuses, I know, but I've gotten out of the writing habit.

And as always, I wrestle with what to write about. I refuse to be another Episcopal blog that either defends or bashes the church. There are plenty of places out there to deal with politics and issues ad nauseum. What I strive to talk about is finding God in the daily stuff of life; in the books I read, the movies I see and the events around me.

So, as John McQuiston wrote about Benedictine spirituality, "Always we begin again."

Change is not always good

2010-08-01T13:31:00.002-06:00

I've been having some trouble with my Google blog. I am switching my email from AOL to Google. You think this should be simple, no? No.

My Google blog site won't let me use my google mail as a primary email account. But wait, aren't they the same company? So if I cancel my AOL account, I will have to start over with a new blog and lose all my past writings. And because the name "Wilderness Thoughts" is already in use by my AOL account, I can't even use the same name! I would think Google would be happy I'm dropping AOL and coming over to them, so why am I being penalized for it?

Its easier to understand the Meaning of Life than for me to understand corporate and computer bureaucracy.

Signed,
Frustated in IN

Social Networking

2010-04-15T11:01:00.003-06:00

Greetings from the Wilderness!

Its been a month since my last entry. I finished the acting book by Mamet and then Easter hit. In that time I've added another little writing piece. I've begun an online Benedictine community and together we will be studying The Rule of Benedict by Joan Chittister. You can find it on Facebook, its a fan page called Benedictine Cafe.

Keeping up with Facebook and Twitter for me, St. Paul's and now Benedictine Cafe has left me little time for blogging in the wilderness. The plus side of that for me is that I can see what is happening within those social networks. I know that St. Paul's has 123 fans, which is fun since we only get 50 people in attendance any given Sunday. The Cafe has 62 fans from all over the country. Some are old friends from Colorado, others clergy friends and some folks who are friends of friends. It will be interesting to share our thoughts as we read Chittister's book. As for the blog, I never know who all is reading it. Perhaps no one?

The hard part is that when I add something to my "to do" list, it becomes harder and harder to keep up with it all. I have to face the fact some things will need to come to an end. At this point I hope its not Wilderness Thoughts. This blog allows me to put forth more thoughtful reflections than you can tweet on Facebook. But I do need to take some things off my plate in order to add the new things that excite me. I've already begun the process of pruning.

At this point I'm not sure what direction the Wilderness will take me. I do love reflecting on what I'm reading on this blog. There hasn't been anything that has really struck me since True and False, however. So until that time, I guess you will have to put up with random thoughts like today.

Spiritual Midwifery

2010-03-19T15:07:00.002-07:00

Reading Ancient Faith, Future Mission. Today's chapter is "Midwifing the movement of the Spirit."

Great insights by Thomas Brackett on existing churches jumping on the Emerging Church bandwagon. I have to admit I see myself in this article. Bracket writes, "I find an alarming incidence of church leaders and academics writing about emerging church as a means of revitalizing congregations in decline."

Existing congregations need to rethink the way they do church. Times have changed and all denominations, not just the Episcopalians and main-line churches, are experiencing decline. Fresh expressions of church can help the established churches move into the new millennium. But we can't forget that what we call "emerging church" is about; listening to the Holy Spirit and birthing something new. There are those who are called to help the existing churches thrive, and there are those who are called to be "Spiritual Midwives."

The trouble arises when a person can't seem to discern which is their calling. Trying to do both "produces a nasty case of cognitive dissonance when an emergent church planter claims to be midwifing new ministries of the Spirit, but their real motivation is to keep (the) denomination from dying by starting new churches with good form."

What do you think? Can a church leader do both? Must we be either Midwife or Trauma Doc? What about a mixed economy?

Random Words

2010-03-11T12:06:00.002-07:00

Seems like I've been too busy the past week to do much reflective thinking and writing. Here are a few words that have been coming through my readings and prayers:
Leaving; Dying; Transformation.

Lenten words, indeed. The Easter words that go along with that are:
Arriving; Resurrection; New Life.

In order to arrive in the Promised Land (the Joshua reading for this Sunday) we have to leave the old and familiar. Even if its slavery, its tough to leave what we know.

In order to be born again and live the resurrected life, we have to die to something. Jesus says its dying to self; our wants, our desires, our past, our comfort zone.

In order for the new wine to flow, we must be changed into new wineskins. As the wine ferments, it stretches the skins. Old ways are like old wines skins, when stretched too much they burst and ruin everything.

Benedict tells the community to take each day as it comes and find the Christ where we are. How easy it is to live in the past or long for the future. The hard part is being at peace in the NOW and seeing Christ at work in the present moment.

Ebenezer & Carin

2010-03-05T08:24:00.002-07:00

Sounds like an interesting couple, doesn't it? But they aren't people, they are rocks.

"Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Jeshanah, and named it Ebenezer; for he said, "Thus far the LORD has helped us." 1 Sam 7:12

Dr. Gregory Neal writes about Ebenezer, "It is usually transliterated as a proper name by dropping the definite article (Ha) from the Hebrew word for "help" (Ezer) and putting it together with the Hebrew word for "stone" (Even) to create: "Ebenezer." The etymological roots of the word, thus defined, should demonstrate that an "Ebenezer" is, literally, a "Stone of Help."

Carin comes out of Celtic spirituality. The Celts would make stone markers to signify holy places.

I've been thinking about these "helping stones" after reading the chapter on Death and Life in "Living with Contradiction" by Esther de Waal. She writes about leaving:

God says, "Leave it all. Leave and go forward into your unknown future." This may well be the start of a time of wandering, of uncertainty, of feeling that the familiar landmarks have gone and the new ones are not yet in place.

Going forward into the wilderness means the familiar landmarks are gone. Without the mountains west of Denver, I have no sense of direction. They oriented me. As long as I could see the mountains, I knew where I was. I miss stupid things like Target and Whole Foods. Whenever I travel to Indianapolis and walk into a Target or Fresh Market, it almost feels like I'm "home." Silly, I know. But landmarks help us to feel at home, to feel oriented.

Along the journey we need to create our own landmarks; our Ebenezers or Carins. I have a collection of rocks in my office. Some have words engraved on them, others are painted with sayings. They help orient me.

This thought of "markers" or helping stones intrigues me. I'm toying with the idea of how to incorporate these in a labyrinth walk. As I toy with them and do some research I will try my hand at writing a labyrinth Ebenezer meditation and see where it all goes. Your thoughts and prayers are certainly welcome.

Lenten Lectio

2010-03-01T13:41:00.002-07:00

Odds and ends in the middle of Lent.

One of the best pieces of advise from my spiritual director was about lectio divina. I have always used it for reading of Holy Scripture, but he suggested I could use Lectio for any type of reading. In fact, one could even use lectio to "read" one's own life. It is with the idea of "holy reading" that I read David Mamet's book on Acting. It opened for me new dimensions of the spiritual life. Now that I've finished it, I am looking for another book to read besides the church books I'm reading. Any suggestions as to what might make some fun and interesting Lectio?

I have been doing other reading as well. I just finished Dan Moseley's book, "Living with Loss." Excellent book. I am scheduled to attend a workshop of his on March 13. This past Saturday I attended a seminar at Earlham School of Religion, "The Spirituality of Caring in the midst of Suffering." Seems appropriate that I'm engaged in work on suffering and loss during Lent. Both events are very encouraging and uplifting, however. Good stuff for the wilderness, all about change and becoming a new creation.

Blessings and peace.

Great performances

2010-02-24T14:01:00.002-07:00

"Truly great performances cause us to question, to pause, to ponder, to reexamine. They do not conduce to the immediate ejaculation "bravo"; and so the Great Actor is, of necessity, seldom a very good actor."

The Great Actor; marked by Mamet in capitol letters; is the one who draws our attention and dazzles us with her/his brilliance. The good actor is the one who draws us, not to his or her self, but into the reality of the moment. When we've experienced really great theater we are taken aback for just a moment as our minds get accustomed to the fact that we are indeed in a theater. Whether its pain or euphoria, it takes us a moment to gather it all in. Then, and only then, can we stand for the "bravo."

The difference, according to Mamet, is the the Great Actor draws attention to himself and not the script. The Great Preacher, likewise, is one who can dazzle us with oratory or just the right emotion in the right spot. Just a few months after I was ordained I went off to a training with a member of my parish. This woman, who later was ordained to the diaconate, and I listened as one of the key note pastors preached. He was very talented, but something didn't ring true. My friend, Sally, turned and said, "Some preachers point to God and some point to themselves."
"..a poor player that struts and frets his hour upon the stage and then is heard no more: it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing." (Macbeth, Act V, Scene V)

Mamet closes his book:

What is true, what is false, what is, finally, important?
It is not a sign of ignorance not to know the answers.
But there is a great merit in facing the questions.

Critics

2010-02-17T15:34:00.004-07:00

Mamet rightly states, "In choosing the stage, you offer yourself constantly to the opinion of others." To be an actor means you have to develop a thick skin. As I wrote in a previous blog, never read the reviews!

In life, and certainly in the church, you will find many critics. Everyone has an opinion and most people think that no matter what you do, they could do it better. Or if not them, they know someone who could. You hear things like, "You aren't as pastoral as our last priest." In one parish the previous rector was known for being very High Church, Anglo-Catholic. During the mea culpa in the mass he would beat his breast so loud it echoed throughout the nave. I was accused of not being "catholic" enough because I was too discreet in thumping my chest.

To deal with the critics its important to cultivate certain "habits" as Mamet called them.

Don't dwell; when you make a mistake or get a bad review, shake the dust off your feet and keep going.

Be honest, truthful; nuff said.

Be your own best friend and the ally of your peers; If you don't like you, who else will? Also, become that person, that friend, that encourager you have always wished to encounter. If you give the others the benefit of a doubt, they will do the same for you.

Be brave; its tough out there an nobody said it (acting, pastoring, living) would be easy.

The Beginning of Wisdom

2010-02-15T08:44:00.002-07:00

The Bible says the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.
AA says that admitting you have a problem is the first step towards healing. (wisdom)
David Mamet says the beginning of wisdom is the phrase, "I don't understand."

All of these statements are similar in that wisdom is being able to admit you don't have all the answers. The foolish are they that know they are always right or assume other people's feelings, thoughts or motives.

Foolishness blames others and situations.
Wisdom does not blame, but looks at the circumstances of life and seeks healing.

Foolishness is about licking our wounds and crying "foal!"
Wisdom is learning from our brokenness and crying "peace."

Foolishness withdraws; taking up its toys and going home like a spoiled child.
Wisdom engages; talking things over and not letting ego rule our will.

Foolishness expects its own way.
Wisdom knows we never get exactly what we want and even what we want is not always what we need.

Foolishness says "I don't need you."
Wisdom says, "We are all connected and broken relationships are a sin against God."

There is so much pain, anger and hatred in the world that sometimes I just don't understand.

2010-02-12T14:53:00.002-07:00

I have always thought of liturgy as drama; the great mystery of life and death, light and darkness; played out every Sunday morning. Like good theater, the liturgy must flow and come together as a unified experience.

Mamet says we go to the theater because of a universal longing for drama. We go to the theater to deal with "anomie, anxiety, guilt, uncertainty, and disconnectedness." We want to know we are not alone, that others have experienced the same angst. We go looking for answers; to see how others got through the pain of life. Going to the theater is not unlike going to church. We go to church to connect with others who are as broken as we are, we go to hear the stories of how God walked with us through the valley of the shadow of death, we go to church to get connected. Liturgy is the ultimate drama that explains our humanity.

Its no wonder we get so attached to the way we worship. Once we've found the liturgy or style that speaks to our anomie, we don't want to lose it. "Don't change the Prayer Book!" "Don't bring contemporary music into church, we love the Hymnal!" These reactions are understandable and natural.

Dan Mosely in "Living with Loss" says who we are defines what we love and in turn, what we love helps define who we are. "We become who we are by what we love. When we lose what we love, we lose part of who we are." Losing the "old liturgy" feels a bit like dying. Part of me is gone. But, God calls us to grow, and growth always means change. Change requires something of the past must die in order for the new to blossom and when there is a death, there is grief.

Change is painful and causes us grief. Life is painful and causes us grief. Do we stop changing? Do we stop living? Christ says we must die to self and pick up our cross and follow him. The drama goes on; in every changing scenes with an ever changing cast and set. The author of life is constantly rewriting the script. Our job as the actors in this drama is to be honest, play the scene and deny nothing.

Play the Scene

2010-02-11T13:23:00.003-07:00

David Mamet writes that the correct unit of study in acting is not the play; it is the scene. The overall intent, or through-line, in the play matters overall, but may not be overly helpful in figuring out how to play a specific scene. The through-line provides guideposts only. The over-all intent may be one thing, but for any individual scene, the purpose or intent may not necessarily pertain.

Mamet is huge on not "over-thinking." The actor's responsibility is to create a scene that is honest and in the moment. "Carve the big tasks up into small tasks and perform these small tasks."

Religious lingo states that as "being in the moment." God tells us not to worry about what time the householder comes home, our "scene" is to be prepared now. The through-line is that Jesus will return to judge the quick and the dead. The "act" is to love God, love our neighbors. The "scene" is to shovel a neighbor's walk, or take someone to the airport, or work in the soup kitchen or welcome the outcast who never felt God's love. How do I love God with all my heart, mind and body? With small actions day in and day out. Grace and mercy are in the small tasks.

Acceptance

2010-02-05T14:57:00.002-07:00

"Let us learn acceptance. This is one of the greatest tools an actor can have. The capacity to accept: to wish things to happen as they do. It is the root of all happiness in life, and it is the root of wisdom for an actor." David Mamet, p 70 True and False

One of the cardinal rules of comedy improv is to accept whatever the other actor throws at you. Never say "no" always say "yes, and...." Take what you are given and build on it. Don't change it to make the situation fit your idea of what is funny. Its is your task to adapt to the situation to make it turn out.

Richard Rohr wrote in "Everything Belongs" that we are to not only accept, but embrace the circumstances of life. Carl Jung taught that it is only when we stop running and denying and turn and embrace the shadow that we will grow and become who God meant us to be.

Mamet goes on to write, "The capacity to accept derives from the will and the will is the source of character. Applying our intention to use only one meaning for words, character is the same onstage and off. It is habitual action."

Our character, who we are as human beings, comes from our will to be habitually accepting of all that life brings. I find great spiritual truth in the movie "Castaway" when Tom Hank's character finds the broken chunk of plastic washed up on shore. He does not reject it as junk, he spends time contemplating how this serendipitous object fits into his world. He eventually uses the large sheet to make a sail that leads to his being rescued. As he reflects upon it later, he believes what happens in life is like the plastic sheet. "You never know," he says, "What the tide will bring in." You never know what God will bring into your life. What looks like trash at the outset may end up being your salvation. But only if we accept whatever the tide (Holy Spirit) washes up on our island.

We cannot deny the terrible things that happen in life. We cannot deny that others will disappoint and let us down. We cannot deny we have very little control over the world. What we can accept is our ability to respond with will and character. We can say, "Yes, and...."

Get Real

2010-02-03T12:39:00.003-07:00

I love it when God shows up in different ways with the same message. Our Benedictine Way group is working through Esther de Waal's book, "Living With Contradiction." This weeks chapter is on Gift and Grace. The theme of the chapter is humility. De Waal describes humility as "facing the truth" and getting rid of illusion and self-deception. To draw closer to God, it is important to strip away the false self and live fully as the true self. Basically to be who and what God created you to be.

I first encountered the concept of a false self vs. true self through Richard Rohr. The more we are true to ourselves, the more we are attuned to the God who created us.

As I finished reading de Waal's chapter, I picked up my other lectio divina, "True and False" by David Mamet. In his chapter on Oral Interpretation, Mamet lampoons actors who delve so much into character that they over think and manipulate the words in the script. He writes, "All the knowledge in the world of the Elizabethan era will not help you play Mary Stuart."

Mamet gives a one sentence paragraph, "We do not embellish those things we care deeply about." He asks us not to parade our false selves, instead to be honest and true in our acting. The audience looks for spontaneity, individuality and strength, not technique. Here's my favorite point that he makes, "It doesn't matter how you say the lines. What matters is what you mean. What comes from the heart goes to the heart. The rest is Funny Voices."

A great actor should never be caught acting. When you notice the technique more than you are moved by the performance, the actor has failed. The worst thing to say when leaving the theater is, "boy, wasn't that great acting!" Instead the talk should be of the reality of the scene. Better to say, "I never cried so hard, or laughed so hard, or felt so angry!" Number one rule for actors, Be Real; Be Authentic. The same rule applies to life. Be Real. Be Authentic. Be who God created you to be, no more, no less.

In Rehearsal

2010-02-01T07:46:00.003-07:00

David Mamet is clear about his dislike of acting workshops, studios, acting coaches, agents and the like. He describes the teachers, coaches, and managers as "the priest caste" who minister to those involved in the "work" of acting. "But life in the studio, in auditioning classes, in casting offices," he writes, "is not the work of acting. Acting is bringing the play to the audience."

Actors can become so involved in the world of the theater that they forget their main purpose is to put on a play, or make a movie. The means become the end.

In the church we don't have to figure out who the priestly caste are, they're the priests, and deacons and bishops. The actors are those who come to church and take classes and learn how to be acolytes and Eucharistic ministers and Christian education directors. What happens inside the church building becomes The Church. The purpose of the church then becomes keeping itself going, attracting new members and teaching them the way the church does things. The means become the end.

The point of church is not maintenance but mission. The mission of the church, according to the Catechism, "is to restore all people to unity with God and each other in Christ." When we don't move outside the confines of the building, its like actors who never leave the rehearsal hall. We talk about the show, we get ready for the show, but the curtain never goes up.

Mamet writes," American schools of acting grew, in the main, from a tradition of acting as a hobby. These schools teach and reward those habits of thought and behavior which fit the student for the leisurely life of the studio, and unfit them for any chance encounter they might have with the real life of the stage." As Christians are we fit for the leisurely life of the "church" and unfit for the encounters we have with the real life of the Christian faith? I pray not. Rehearsal's over, time to hit the stage.

Life Guards

2010-01-26T05:54:00.003-07:00

Timothy, Titus and Silas; Companions of Paul , John 5:1-18

Now in Jerusalem by the Sheep Gate there is a pool, called in Hebrew Beth-zatha, which has five porticoes. In these lay many invalids - blind, lame, and paralyzed. One man was there who had been ill for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there and knew that he had been there a long time, he said to him, "Do you want to be made well?" The sick man answered him, "Sir, I have no one to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up; and while I am making my way, someone else steps down ahead of me." Jesus said to him, "Stand up, take your mat and walk." At once the man was made well, and he took up his mat and began to walk. (vs. 2-9)

The pool's water brought healing and was open to all. Many came to receive the love that was so freely offered. But here was a man who wanted to be healed, but couldn't get there on his own. Unlike the paralytic who was carried by his friends to Jesus and lowered into the house via the roof, this man apparently didn't have any friends to help in his healing. This is the story of an outcast beggar with no one to help him become whole. Not only did no one help him, but even as he struggled to get to the water on his own, others would crowd in front and make it impossible for him enter.

Viewing the church as the pool of healing; we do enter through the waters of baptism; I wonder how good we are at helping those who can't help themselves. We open our doors and say "All are welcome" and then stand back greeting with friendly smiles those who have found their way to our door. But how are we at going out and carrying in those who can't seem to make it to us? Are we like those hotel pools that prominently display the disclaimer, "No Pool Attendant on Duty?" In order to avoid future litigation they are saying "Swim at your own risk, there aren't any lifeguards."

The Church needs life guards, not to keep people from drowning, but to go out and help those who want God's healing touch, but just need someone to reach out and help them. We also need to look at how we might hinder others who want to come. Radical welcome means doing what ever it takes to make "the other" feel like this is their home too.

Big results with little effort

2010-01-22T10:13:00.002-07:00

That's the heading of an ad in today's paper. The ad was promoting an online job fair. Having been in the position of looking for a job and knowing several people who have been looking for months, I know how much effort it takes. Looking for a job is a full-time job in itself and any help is greatly appreciated, so I applaud Gannet publishing and everyone else involved in the job fair. I'm referring several folks to their website. But still, I find the headline very intriguing.

In this world of instant gratification it seems we like things the easy way. I don't need to exercise and diet to lose weight, all I have to do is wear an "amazing weight loss belt" under my business clothes and the inches just fall off. No need to prepare a meal, just "nuke" an instant microwaveable dinner on demand. No more waiting and saving for things you need, charge them at 22% interest. We want it all but we don't want to wait or put out the effort.

Our spiritual life is no different. We want to have God's "peace that passes understanding" but we don't want to have to work for it. It's easier to simply pray, "Please bless me" than it is to take on the spiritual disciplines of study, prayer and worship. We come to church hoping the music and the sermon lift our spirits enough to get us through the difficult week ahead. "Fill me, feed me" and when we no longer feel fed at one church, we move on to another looking for the big results with little effort.

If you want to build your body, you work out. Don't exercise and your body goes soft. You want to build your brain and memory you keep reading and studying. Simple things like crossword puzzles and Sudoku have been proven to help keep dementia at bay. Plop down in front of TV night after night and your brain goes soft. If you want to grow closer to God and live your faith then you need to pray, study and not just read your Bible, take a class, go on a retreat. If you don't keep growing spiritually your faith goes soft and soft faith won't get you through the hard times and soft faith won't bring you joy and the peace of God that passes all understanding.

You want the Big Results? Then start putting in the effort.

Deny Nothing

2010-01-19T15:33:00.002-07:00

Its interesting that this past week I've come across this simple teaching from two very different sources. The teaching, "deny nothing" was in a meditation from Richard Rohr and also in my reading of David Mamet's book on acting.

I first heard this many years ago in my comedy improvisation class. Deny nothing. Never say "no", always say "yes and...." Build on what your acting partner gives you. When you deny the gift they have given you, you cut off the creative process. Saying "no" destroys the moment and in the actor's bid to gain control, everything is lost.

Mamet says in his book, "Here is the best acting advice I know. And when I am moved by a genius performance, this is what I see the actor doing: Invent nothing, deny nothing. This is the meaning of character." He goes on to say that the actor must have the courage to resist trying to build themselves up and when it is resisted the actor actually finds the possibility of greatness.

In his book, Everything Belongs, Richard Rohr writes about the grace that is found in seeing God in the moment. When we are fully open to the "now" we become fully open to God. He writes;
"Everything belongs and everything can be received. We don’t have to deny, dismiss, defy, or ignore anything. What is, is somehow, on some level, okay. What is, is always the great teacher. From that initial surrender, you will find what you can and should do to change things."

Most things in life I cannot control. About the only thing in my power is my ability to respond. Wishing for things to be different only wastes my time and energy and, most importantly, keeps me from seeing God in reality and in the now. It is then that I can see what I can do to bring about real change. And that change always begins in me.

Playing to the critics

2010-01-12T14:28:00.002-07:00

A piece of advice I got some years back, "Never read a review; good or bad."

Nobody likes a bad review. We sweat till it appears and when the words are less than kind we retreat into that dark space where actors go to beat themselves up. Never mind how we felt about the performance, or how the director felt about it, or even how the audience reacted. When someone writes in a public forum that we stank, its all that seems to matter.

But certainly we can read the good reviews, right? By playing to the critics we lose sight of why we are acting in the first place. We don't act to get praise or be famous or make people like us. We act in order to move the audience. We are, ultimately, there to please the audience.

The same advice applies to the church. Don't read the reviews. In other words, don't compare your work and your church with other people's. Whether its at the local ministerial association, diocesan convention or what have you. Its not what other people think about how you are doing that counts. The harder question is, "Who, then, is our audience?" Is it the congregation? Partially, yes. If you can't keep the folks happy, then God's work is not going to get done through you in that place. But if the only goal becomes keeping the congregation happy, then you lose the prophetic voice of the Holy Spirit. Sometimes congregations need to hear the hard words and be challenged to grow and change.

Ultimately then the real audience whom you seek to reach is God. You are playing your part to build God's kingdom, not your own or even the kingdom of "the church."

Acting in all honesty

2010-01-11T12:35:00.002-07:00

My time in acting workshop a few years back provided me with some of my greatest opportunities for emotional and spiritual growth. I learned that to be good at the art of acting, a person did not "put on" a character, but instead had to become truly authentic in who they were. Honest emotions, thoughts and actions gave the the most honest performance.

I am being reminded of that as I read "True and False: Heresy and common sense for the Actor" by David Mamet. Mamet advises the actor not to focus on one's self and one's craft. He basically says, "stay out of acting school." This type of study, he says, makes one focus too much inwardly. Our best response is to be outwardly directed. By being outwardly directed, the actor is completely open to the others onstage. Instead of planning every movement and thought and line, the actor is open to the "truth of the moment." Wonderful things happen when we get out of our own heads and engage each other in that truth.

I see this in terms of churches. All churches want to be vital, growing congregations. What happens in their desire to grow can be like an actor staying in school. They over-think what they need to do. Instead of being open to the world around them, they focus only on themselves, thus defeating the goal of growth and vitality. Churches put on programs and get coaches who help them with Congregational Development. All their energy is upon "growing." This becomes stilted, just like the actor who tries too hard to "act" his or her part.

Like a good actor, a church must get out of its own way and be outwardly directed. Don't think about what you can do to bring people in, think about how you can minister in Christ's name. Think about engaging the world in "the truth of the moment." If you can authentically bring Christ with you into the world, the world will notice.

This acting tip is also good for life. The more we focus on our selves, the more inauthentic we become. Socrates said, "The unexamined life is not worth living." I agree, but the over-examined life is even worse. When you get out of your own head and start thinking more of others, things start to turn around. Statistics show that people who are actively involved in helping others are physically healthier, less depressed, have more energy and are generally happier.

Taking Mamet's quote and substituting "life" for acting you get, "Life consists in the main of getting out of one's own way, and in learning to deal with uncertainty and being comfortable being uncomfortable." In other words, don't over-prepare, just get out there and act in all honesty.

Blessed to be a blessing

2010-01-06T11:31:00.002-07:00

I preached my Epiphany sermon last Sunday. My main point was how we are to be gifts to God and the world. We re-gift the gift of the Christ Child in our daily lives. God blesses us and we in turn are called to bless one another. I used the phrase, "You are God's gift to the world."

In posting that that on Facebook and Twitter, I received some interesting responses. In most cases that phrase is seen as negative. "Who do you think you are? God's gift to the world?" Why, yes I am, actually. But what does that mean? In the common sense it means someone is full of pride and self-importance. They think themselves better than everyone else. I don't think that's the kind of gift God is sending us. Look at God's son for example; humble, caring, giving, forgiving and willing to die for us. If you truly acted like God's gift to the world, then you would be more like Christ.

I know I need to be better about being God's gift. When I grumble, whine, complain, get angry or short, I'm not blessing anyone. We can bless with something as simple as a smile. A "thank you" and "please" go a long way in blessing people, especially strangers. After standing in line at the store for what seems like forever, smile at the clerk and say thank you as you check out. You can actually even bless them. Saying "God bless" as you leave won't insult anyone. Even non-believers can be touched by your care and concern. The best Gospel is the one you live, not the one you preach.

Epiphany is about the light of Christ coming into the world. Let it come through you. You are blessed to be a blessing.

Returning Gifts

2009-12-30T08:29:00.002-07:00

Today's meditation from Holtz is on returning gifts. This year I returned only one gift, a sweater. I had one very similar and and didn't really need one more sweater; even if it was orange. I got something I needed, a pair of jeans. I always feel bad when I return a gift. Its almost like I'm refusing the love and thoughts of the person who bought it. I reject the gift and in some corner of my mind it feels like I'm rejecting them.

Holtz feels much the same way. He goes on to relate our Christmas gifts with the gifts God gives us. But its not just the good gifts, the blessings, which God gives us. Holtz sees all things as potential gifts from God. He writes:

When I face a serious challenge, for example, which is a great opportunity for me to grow in trust by taking a risk, I say to God, "I don't really want this gift; may I please exchange it for one that is a little less frightening?... When the Lord offers me a perfect opportunity during a quiet prayer period to lay myself open to the divine will, I suddenly decide that I would rather be somewhere else doing something that's easier.

This is the hard part for me. Its easy to see good news and blessings as gifts from God, its hard to see the difficulties and struggles in life as gifts. Hardship makes me stronger and more resilient. When I am powerless, the gift is in being fully reliant upon God. When all my ideas, plans, schemes and talents don't seem to work, it becomes a gift to know I'm in God's hands.

There was a time in my life when it seemed like I lost everything; job, career, position, possessions, family. I struggled to make enough money to keep a roof over my head on food on the table. Other people came to my rescue. My 80 year-old mother gave me a car and paid my insurance. A friend gave me $200 to pay bills and insisted I didn't need to repay him. Other people would send me a check for $50 for no apparent reason except that they were moved by the Holy Spirit. It was tough, but God got me through it. As I look back on it now, I see that what was happening was really a blessing. I came to understand grace in ways I never got before. My sin of pride was shattered and now I know its not what people think about me or even what I think about myself. What matters is that I'm a child of God and God's beloved. I am more empathetic and can minister to others in ways that I didn't see before. I've hit bottom and with God's grace, I've made it through.

When life happens and things don't turn out like we planned; we have two options. We can complain, sit on our ash heap and plead with God, or we can take what has been given us and see how God might be blessing us through this. I'm sure the cross didn't seem like a gift at the time, but it is through the cross we all receive the gift of salvation. What is going on in your life that can become the gift of bringing you closer to God?

Disappointment & Letdown

2009-12-29T10:15:00.002-07:00

In his meditation for December 28, Holtz writes about the post-Christmas letdown. "In fact," he writes, "by its very nature Christmas is destined to disappoint us." We, as the consumer-driven people we are, expect Christmas to be filled with miracles. The Polar Express takes us on a wild ride and Santa brings a happy ending to every girl and boy. Madison Avenue tells us what we need to make us happy. The more money we spend and the more hectic we make out activities, the better everything will be.

I'm afraid I have a history of being disappointed when I don't get exactly the gifts I wanted. These gifts tended to be material things, but not necessarily of monetary value. If I spent hours picking out the right gift for someone, I felt disappointed if they gave me a gift I thought to be unimaginative or last minute. Its not so much how much I spent, but what I put into it. I then judged their gift in relation to mine. It seems no one ever measured up.

As I grow older, and I pray wiser, I realize how much God has given me and how my gifts in return can never measure up. Christ died for me. God loves me unconditionally. In turn, do I die to self and live for others? Do I love unconditionally, or do I simple love those who love me? Do I stop loving others when they don't love me as I would like to be loved? If God did that, none of us would be loved for none of us love God as fully as we could or should. But God doesn't walk away when we don't measure up. God loves us even more. Wow!

Holtz asks us to look at the holiday season with all its disappointments and heartaches and be aware of God's presence. See God in the disappointments, the tiredness, the sense of sadness, and "see in them, too, opportunities to grow closer to the newborn Christ." The letdown becomes the opportunity to pray, asking the Incarnate Lord to come and dwell with us today and be the source of gladness when we're sad, weak, depressed or hopeless. This Sunday we're singing one of my favorite hymns, "In the Bleak Mid-Winter." No matter how bleak and hopeless, God comes to us in Emmanuel. Christ the Lord.

Visitations

2009-12-23T10:49:00.002-07:00

On this Little Christmas Eve the meditation from Holtz is on "visiting." Yesterday it was on "hospitality." Those are two sides of the same coin, receiving those who visit you and being received by others. In each meditation the emphasis is on recognizing Christ in the visitor.

This year it seems like I'm doing most of the visiting. On Christmas Day I'm visiting my partner's family and on Saturday; The Feast of St. Stephen which is called Boxing Day in England; I'm visiting my son and his partner. If they are to greet me as Christ, my task is to bless them as Christ would bless them. I am called to be the "servant-guest". I see in my visits as much a need for the gift of hospitality as when people visit me for the holidays. I may not have to clean the house and prepare all the food, but my heart should be as open and welcoming as if they were standing on my threshold. When guests arrive at my home, I sometimes tend to be too much Martha and not enough Mary. I get distracted by trying to be more Martha Stewart than Jesus Christ. As a guest I can let go of my drive for perfection and be the welcoming Mary. I can take time to listen and be fully present. I can take the time to give a proper welcome in the Name of Christ.

For those who are traveling to visit and those who are waiting for guests to arrive, remember it is really the Christ Child whom we welcome at Christmas. May your heart be a manger where the Lord of Lord's finds a dwelling place. Merry Christmas

Seeking God

2009-12-17T08:50:00.002-07:00

Last night I gathered with old friends who I don't get to see very much since I moved out of state. In the midst of the games and laughter, one of my friends who doesn't go to church leaned over and asked me about this whole Jesus thing. "What's with this whole sacrificing his son thing and why is all that necessary?" She's spiritual, but not religious, believes there is a loving God out there but doesn't get the whole "Jesus" thing. "Why all the talk of death and sacrifice and crosses? What kind of sick God demands a sacrifice?"

I tried to give the Reader's Digest version of the Trinity, Jesus is god's only begotten son but not in the same sense as we think. God and Jesus are one, so God is actually paying the price for us. I also shared my belief that Jesus is God's way to connect with us and restore brokenness. I'm not so much into atonement theories as I'm into God becoming flesh in order bring us together.

I think a lot about people like my friend, who are seeking something in their lives and believe in a God of love, but don't get the thousands of years of Christian doctrine. They don't respond to turn or burn evangelism. They turn off when they are asked the old questions, "If you died right now, do you know where you will spend eternity?" People are looking for meaning and relationship, not condemnation. We need to offer community and love, not guilt and shame.

The reading in Holtz for today is about seeking God. The monk's main task in life is to seek God. The flip side of that is for the monk to be Christ to everyone who comes to the monastery. As modern-day Benedictine's, our task is seek Christ in all places, people and situations and to be as Christ to all. I see how often the church and her people seem to get in the way more often as they help. I pray I can be better at reaching the people like my friend who don't see a need for religion but who feel the need for God.

Perfect Christmas

2009-12-16T07:49:00.002-07:00

The pressure is always on to have the perfect Christmas. The tree has to be just right, the menu must be what we've eaten every Christmas for the past 20 years and we simply have to recapture all the old feelings. But when the ever-changing realities of life smack us up side the head, we get depressed and feel "Christmas has been ruined." My family has been particularly good at that. The past two generations have all but given up on Christmas. Too many disappointments, its just not the same, why bother became the Christmas greetings in my grandparents and parents home. If it can't be perfect, then Bah, Humbug.

Holtz writes in his meditation on Peace on Earth, that this desire for perfection is really the sin of pride. If we seek the humility of Christ, then we don't need things to be perfect. I mean, did Jesus have a great Christmas? He ended up in a stable.

Our desire to have it perfect is our desire to have it "our" way which truly is the sin of pride. The point of Christmas is really not family time, lavish presents or keeping hold of the past. The point of Christmas is to celebrate the God who became flesh in order to transform the world. Radical hospitality, radical hope, radical love is the root of Christmas.

The kids have married and moved to another state, the economy doesn't allow you to spend as much on presents and the new sugar-free, low carb diet doesn't let you eat all the good stuff. Its still the birthday of Christ. We are still called to give God praise and proclaim the Good News. Be thankful for what God has given you, share what you can, love like mad and sing out, "For unto us a child is born."

Joy to the World

2009-12-15T06:24:00.002-07:00

In the midst of the brokenness of the world, Christians are called to be joyful at all times and in all places. That seems like an impossible task. How can we be happy and joyful all the time? I mean there are days we just feel tread upon. There are days we are depressed, sad, angry, lonely; anything but joyful.

Holtz wrote that the New Testament word for joy usually refers to calm delight. That's not the image we normally think of when we say "joyful." Its an image that is very helpful for me, however. I don't have to be deliriously happy all the time, but I can remain calm. I don't need to react, or over-react in many cases, I just need to keep my head.

Still, the thought of keeping your head while others lose theirs might seem daunting. We remain calm because we know that no matter what happens, God has hold of us. I am not alone, I'm not unloved, I'm not worthless. The Creator of the Universe and sustainer of all life loves me enough to go to any lengths to keep me close. So, when I wake up at 5:00 a.m. and my mind begins to fret and worry. I pray, I read the psalms, I remember that God's got it covered. Benedictine's call this pre-dawn prayer time the Vigil. To be vigilant means to get up early and get on with it.

As I wish people joy this Christmas, I am wishing them calm and delight in what they already have. May the peace of the Lord be with you.

Sacredness of Creation

2009-12-10T05:10:00.002-07:00

In her chapter, "Living With the World", de Waal wrote, "For we are now living in a world which lacks a vision of the sacredness of creation, and which has lost its commitment to the dignity of life."

There have been two very disturbing news stories in the past week. A seventeen year old boy strangled his eleven year old brother because he watched a TV show about a serial killer and he wanted to know what it felt like. And then just a few days later there was another story about a fifteen year old girl who killed a ten year old neighbor for the same reason. Like many other people I wonder, "What is wrong with the world?" Is it worse or do we just know more because of communications and the media?

I do know we have become callous about violence and murder. We make movies like Hostel and Saw and wonder why we are such a violent nation. Video games rack up the number of enemies killed in combat. On TV we have shows about serial killers, Dexter, and make them into the heroes. Such events make the Advent prayer, "Come, Lord Jesus, come" even more urgent. What kids need this Christmas is a little more adult supervision when it comes to TV. Instead of Rogue Warrior or Halo under their tree, kids need the news that God created all things and we all have infinite value. The world is in need of God's love, and its up to us to spread it around.

All I want for Christmas

2009-12-08T06:26:00.002-07:00

I've just begun my Christmas shopping. I've never been one of those people who buy throughout the year and stash things away. No Black Friday shopping for me. I can't seem to actually go out and shop till at least the tree is up. The other end of buying gifts is giving people my wish list.

Life was so much easier as a child, you knew what you wanted, and most likely, ended up getting it. But as an adult there really aren't any "things" that I particularly want or need. The house is in a constant state of updating; paint, cabinet doors, etc. But there aren't any non-practical gifts on my list. The things that I want most for Christmas are things of the heart. I pray for health and happiness for my family. I pray for career clarity for a couple of loved ones. I pray that the holiday blues could just go away for those who are having a hard time. I pray for the peace that passes understanding.

In Albert Holtz's book, the meditation for last Saturday is on what we want for Christmas. (Yes, its Tuesday and I'm just getting to it.) Holtz writes about the "longing and hoping for something to fill our emptiness." "Wanting," he says, "is simply part of being human - it comes with not being God, being incomplete. We're always searching relentlessly, sometimes even desperately, to fill the void inside of us."

I imagine there are some people who don't think they have any void in their lives, they have everything they can think of. There are others who are overcome by the void, who feel like they have nothing. The thing to remember is that the void is never filled with money, possessions and things. I can't help but think about Tiger Woods; arguably the best golfer ever, certainly not lacking in financial wealth, a beautiful wife and child, and yet there is a void that he tried to fill with, apparently, several affairs.

In his Rule for Monks, St. Benedict demands that any new aspirants to the community "truly seek God." What do we seek this Christmas? Beautiful, expensive presents under the tree? That perfect mate to make us complete? The job that will give us financial security? My prayer for myself and for the world is that we focus on the real gift of Christmas; Emmanuel, God with us.

As I go out today and seek the right gifts for family and loved ones, my prayer is that I can also be the gift. I pray that I can be Christ to those around me, and in doing so, help them to see God.

Dodging the orange barrels

2009-11-30T10:18:00.002-07:00

As I pulled out of Earlham School of Religion this morning, I was faced with another piece of unending road work in Richmond. What used to be lanes for traffic are now stretches of crumbled asphalt surrounded by large orange construction barrels. The old patterns of traffic have shifted and obstacles abound. It seems no matter where you turn, the roads are just a mess.

As I swung out past a barrel I thought, "what a mess, just like life!" Just like Advent. The road is under construction for a purpose, to make it better in the long run. Its not a destruction zone, its a construction zone. But in the mean time, it requires me to learn new ways and deal with the obstacles. Advent is a season of preparing. As John cried out in the wilderness, "Prepare the way of the Lord, make his paths straight. Every valley shall be filled, and every mountain and hill shall be made low, and the crooked shall be made straight, and the rough ways made smooth."

But like Richmond, the preparation never seems to end. Its not just during Advent, or Lent or seminary or what ever it is for the moment. Its what it means to be a follower of The Way. We are always clearing away the potholes of life and charting new courses. I wake one morning and find my job has been taken from me. Its like waking up and finding the road in front of your house has been cleared away. As painful and hard as it is, we can look at it as a time of destruction or construction. "Behold, I make all things new," says the Lord. But as the old is stripped away to make way for the new, it's still a pain. We can be immobilized by it, or we can learn to dodge the orange barrels.

Advent

2009-11-29T15:09:00.002-07:00

Its been over a month since my last entry. I'm sure most of you out there thought I had fallen off the planet. No, I've just allowed myself to get too preoccupied and not spending time in quiet reflection. When the blog becomes one more "thing" to do and not an extension of my spirituality, its time for a break.

This is going to be a Benedictine Advent. Not only is our Benedictine Group reading "Living with Contradiction" by Esther deWaal, I am reading "From Holidays to Holy Day; a Benedictine Walk through Advent" by Albert Holtz.

The reading from deWall was about living with others and how challenging that can be. After a rather challenging weekend it was good to be reminded how we are to best love one another. Good part for me was that are three healthy marks in a relationship; sustaining, healing and growth. We are called to hang in there, especially when it gets tough, to always forgive, and to be open to change and growth. The marks can be painful and hard. I know how hard it can be to forgive. I know how tempting it is to flee and not stay and work it out. And I know that change means dying to the comfortable patterns.

Holtz wrote about Kairos. At Cursillo, we talked about Kairos and Chronos; God's time versus regular time. For Benedict, all time is Kairos. Holts defines it as "season" a time meant for a specific purpose or season. As in, "A time (kairos) for every purpose under heaven." We are in the season of Advent, a time set aside for the purpose preparing our hearts for the Christ.

As I reflect upon love and season, I think of my favorite song from Rent, "Seasons of Love." How do we measure a year? Time? Can we measure it in how much we love, forgive, sustain and grow? I pray so.

"I'm not a racist"

2009-10-16T08:06:00.002-06:00

An interracial couple in Louisiana were denied a marriage license by a white judge. In defending his actions, the judge said,"I'm not a racist. I just don't believe in mixing the races that way,I have piles and piles of black friends. They come to my home, I marry them, they use my bathroom. I treat them just like everyone else."

How many times have we heard that said, "I'm not a _____." (Fill in the blank. Racist, homophobe, sexist) Then defend it by saying how many "friends" we have who belong to that sub-group. I have lots of black friends, I even let them use my toilet. Boy, if that's not a sign of radical welcome, I don't know what is? (I hope you are reading the sarcasm there.)

The difference between Radical Welcome and mere tolerance is the friendship factor. Tolerance says, "go ahead, use the john. After all, I can use Lysol after you leave." Friendship means I get to know you and let you know me. Friendship means caring for one another. If this judge had real black friends, he would care about the way they are treated by the world. A true friend would realize that the love between two people who want to commit to each other and spend their lives together is sacred, whether they are of the same race or same gender.

Marriage equality is marriage equality. The loving relationship of an interracial couple or a gay couple in no way diminishes anyone else's relationship. It will not destroy the institution of marriage or the fabric of society. Radical welcome is about building bridges, not walls.

Radical Welcome comes with a cost

2009-10-15T08:48:00.003-06:00

Thursday of Proper 23: Mark 10:34-42

34 "Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth; I have not come to bring peace, but a sword... 39 Those who find their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for my sake will find it. 40 "Whoever welcomes you welcomes me, and whoever welcomes me welcomes the one who sent me.

Stephanie Spellers advices us to choose our battles when moving toward radical welcome. To welcome the other requires us to change and change is generally painful. We are creatures of habit and comfort. Learning new ways, adapting to new customs pulls us out of our comfort zone.

Here are some of her guidelines for change:
1. No one can do everything at once so pace yourself.
2. Give thanks for small victories, the war wasn't won in a day.
3. Be gentle with each other, loving patience and forbearance on all sides.
4. Teach each step of the way.

All relationships require work. Radically welcoming relationships require even more, but that's what picking up the cross to follow Christ means.

Bearing fruit

2009-09-30T10:38:00.002-06:00

Wednesday of Proper 21; Matthew 7:13-21

18 A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit. 19 Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. 20 Thus you will know them by their fruits. 21 "Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father in heaven.

Its not just about saying the words, its about bearing fruit. We can't sit back and merely say all are welcome at our table and then do nothing. Are you bearing fruit? Are there actually different cultures in the pews? Are there people of different color, socioeconomic status, background, language, sexual orientation?

In order to be a congregation of radical welcome, it may mean you go out into the community and actually invite The Other to worship. They will not just wander in by themselves. The image the church has portrayed in the past, or even their own fears and suspicions, will keep them at a distance. The dominant culture must meet them where they are and show them that it is open to change.

The old joke is that the Episcopal Church doesn't make fishers of people, instead it makes builders of aquariums. We used to build the nicest aquariums and wait for the really intelligent fish to find us. That's not radical welcome. We need to get out and build relationships outside the official church structure in order to win people's trust. Saying you are radically welcoming and being radically welcoming are not the same thing.

Come As You Are

2009-09-23T09:01:00.002-06:00

St. Bartholomew's in New York used to offer a "Come as you are" service on Sunday evenings. (It has sense been replace by a "casual, intimate" Community Service.)

The name "Come as you are" means more than just casual attire. The radical welcome in that phrase invites people to come with their doubts, fears, questions and even off-beat theology. My friend Nadia Boltz-Weber, who pastors an emerging Lutheran congregation in Denver, invites people to come as they are to her weekly theology pub. Meeting in a local pub she accepts all, but she is apologetically Christian. "No pseudo-Buddhist-Christian crap" she says. Its all God's grace and love seen through the eyes of a radically welcoming Lutheran.

I know those who say that God accepts us as we are but loves us too much to let us stay that way. I agree in principal, but not necessarily on practice. The way that phrase can be used says "come in you who are off-beat, gay, lesbian, unorthodox and I will make you straight." I think the way God changes us is by drawing us closer to God. God accepts us no matter how far away from God we have become. What God does then is draw us in and we are transformed by that relationship. We are more loving, less judgemental, more open to the other, less closed off and exclusive. We become more like Christ.

Re-imagining our common life

2009-09-22T12:52:00.002-06:00

"The call to ministry is the call to be a citizen of the kingdom of God in a new way, the daring, free, accepting, compassionate way Jesus modeled. It means being bound by no yesterday, fearing no tomorrow, drawing no lines between friend and foe, the acceptable ones and the outcasts. Ministry is commitment to the dream of God." Verna Dozier as quoted in Radical Welcome, p. 97

In Part III of Radical Welcome, Spellers outlines how we are to change the very way we live our common life. She starts by showing us that we need to identify where we are now and then move on to ask, "Where is God inviting us to go?" We've been asking that question in one form or another from some time at St. Paul's, "What is God calling us to do? or What is God calling us to be?" Those are just other ways to ask Speller's question.

In Scripture the answer seems to be clear. When Abraham set out into the wilderness or when Moses led the people of Israel into the wilderness, God's directions were clear. God said, "Go." That's right, that's all God said. God didn't give Abraham or Moses a map or even a destination. God said, "Go." There is an outward movement. There is a sense of being sent. But we don't have a clue as to where we are going. God says move and I'll nudge you along the way. Respond first, start moving and only then will God let you know if you are on the right track or not.

What this says to me is that whether its our own personal life or the life of a congregation, we are meant to get up and take those first steps of faith. Take a step, you don't have to make a life-long commitment, just that first step. If it seems right, keep walking, if not, take a step in another direction. If something doesn't seem right or if a project or idea doesn't succeed, it just means God has another option. Try again.

Be daring, be free. Don't be bound by yesterday or fearful of tomorrow. Trust God and lift you foot.

Radical Transformation

2009-09-08T14:01:00.002-06:00

Tuesday of Proper 18, Phil 1:12-30

27 Only, live your life in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that, whether I come and see you or am absent and hear about you, I will know that you are standing firm in one spirit, striving side by side with one mind for the faith of the gospel

Part of radical welcome in a parish is the re-imagining of your common life together. Spellers accurately describes the informal contract most parishioners have with their churches; they come for security, stability, beauty, comfort, familiarity, and pain alleviation. They want the church to be a safe harbor from the storms of the world. In return, the members support the church and its programs with money and effort. Its very much, "You take care of me, and I'll take care of you."

Trouble comes when the church or the priest pushes or challenges folks to live into the values it professes. There was a joke that I heard in my parish in Denver about the preacher who gave rousing sermons and everyone liked him. Then one day he started talking about all the sins the congregation had to get up. The church was outraged. When he asked what was the problem he was told, "Before you was just preaching, now you're meddling"

Spellers is right on when she says most of us just want to live and love well and we don't come to church for radical transformation. But, that's what Christ offers us. Pick up our cross, die to self, become a new creation, grow spiritually. Saying yes to Jesus means saying yes to radical transformation. Its no longer about us, its about God.

Welcoming God

2009-09-03T08:34:00.002-06:00

Before we can even think about welcoming The Other among us; different races, gays and lesbians, the poor; we have to offer radical welcome to the ultimate Other, God. Evangelical language talks about inviting God into our hearts. We think it ends there. But just like there's a difference between inviting people into our communities and giving them power, there's a difference between inviting God into my heart and letting God rule my heart.

Radical welcome of God requires me to be open to change. Becoming a disciple of Christ is all about transformation. Do I politely listen to God and do my own thing, or do I actually change my life for this new relationship?

I talk to folks who say how they love coming to our church, its so welcoming and friendly. I hear comments on the beauty of our building and liturgy. I hear less talk of how people love being the church. I pray for those times when I hear, "I love being in Bible study because it brings me closer to Christ" or "I love being challenged to grow deeper in my spirituality, it really changes me."

Radical welcome means embracing God, change and the other.

Reign of God

2009-09-02T10:24:00.002-06:00

Spellers writes in Part II, "If anyone is wondering what the reign of God looks like, they should be able to look at the mission of the church and catch a glimpse."

The mission of the Episcopal Church, according to the Catechism, is to "restore all people to unity with God and each other in Christ." We are to be healers and reconcilers in the world, showing God's love to all.

The specific mission of St. Paul's is to carry out the Church's mission by, "Celebrating all that God has given us, moved by the Gospel of Jesus Christ and empowered by the Holy Spirit, we accept everyone around one table, worship together and reach out to the world in love." For us, we see the reign of God as celebration, empowering by the Holy Spirit, sharing both earthly bread and heavenly bread and embracing all in love. The image for us is of banquet. "Come and share the feast with us and then let's take the bounty out into the world."

According to the description of radical hospitality give by Spellers, that banquet would include foods and drinks of all kinds. Its not just about coming to our table and eating our food, radical hospitality means everyone gets to be in the kitchen. In radical welcome, there are no guests, just family.

What it means to be in.

2009-08-26T12:58:00.004-06:00

We all want to be on the "in" rather than the out. Spellers writes about three kinds of "in"; INvitation, INcorporation and INcarnation.

"Our church is inviting." This is a good thing. Nobody wants a church that isn't welcoming. Inviting says "Come, join our community and share our cultural values and heritage." Once a person joins the inviting church, they are assimilated. I've taken several workshops and bought more than a fair share of books on how to assimilate new people into a parish.

"Our church is diverse." This is the inclusive church. New members are not assimilated, they are incorporated and thus keep some of their own cultural identity but the institutional structure and practices remains unchanged.

Spellers says to offer radical welcome, churches are to live a life of incarnation. "Jesus emptied himself and took on humanity; radical welcome calls us to surrender and openness to the culture and perspective of The Other." The radically welcoming church embodies and expresses the full range of voices and gifts present. Power is shared and all those in attendance shape the identity, mission, leadership, worship and ministries. Both the individual and the church are changed and a whole new creation begins to live.

The premise of Spellers book is that its no longer enough to be inviting and inclusive. Churches need to be incarnational; willing to die to self in order for God to bring forth a new creation.

Loving our Neighbor

2009-08-20T08:39:00.003-06:00

Thursday of Proper 15, Mark 12:28-34

'The first is, "Hear, O Israel: the Lord our God, the Lord is one; you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength." The second is this, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself." There is no other commandment greater than these.'

Radical Welcome is about loving the Other. Spellers writes, "God made us all and loves us all, and no one more than those society casts out or sets apart."

Radical welcome is about loving the person of another color, race, creed, socio-economic background or sexual orientation. Its about welcoming and embracing them as part of us. Some folks may say, "We have people of color in our church or we have gays and lesbians in our church" and think it stops there. We allow them, we tolerate them, we even pass the peace with them. But Radical Welcome means we are open to their culture and experiences. Radical welcome is more than letting them sit in the pews, its about changing us. What does each group have to teach us? How does each group change our liturgy, enhance or community and broaden our outreach? Once a church begins to offer radical welcome, it also invites radical change. God is a god of transformation.

God's Dreams

2009-08-12T08:52:00.002-06:00

The first chapter of Part I of Radical Welcome begins with a quote by Bishop Michael Curry of North Carolina.

God is changing things so that they finally reflect the dream of God. It will be new to us, but it is merely the fulfillment of what God intended all along.

What kind of dreams does God have? I found that an intriguing question. As humans we have dreams and aspirations; we dream of finding the perfect partner, of having the dream job, of being famous, rich, slender and all around adored.

In the musical "Children of Eden" God sings about having a beautiful dream, and out of that dream came creation. When God dreams, things happen; new things, wonderful things, amazing things. At our vestry meeting last night we read Isaiah 43:18-21.

"Behold I am doing a new thing, do you not perceive it?"

God tells us not to live in the past, but to be open to God's dreams of something new. Its scary for us, though. We like the comfort of the way things used to be. I like to say, "Think outside the box." God says, "Let me create a whole new box."

Engaging in radical welcome means letting go of our dreams and being open to the bigger dreams of God.

Radical Welcome

2009-08-11T08:14:00.002-06:00

I have begun reading "Radical Welcome: Embracing God, the Other and the Spirit of Transformation" by Stephanie Spellers. I made a comment about it on Facebook and a couple of people asked me to share my thoughts and give a review. Since I've blogged through several books before, it seemed like a good idea to make this book the basis for the blog for the next several weeks. When possible, I will connect it to the daily office readings.

Stephanie defines radical welcome is when "(a) community seeks to welcome the voices, presence and power of many groups - especially those who have been defined as The Other, pushed to the margins, cast out, silenced, and closeted - in order to help shape the congregation's common life and mission." Reaching out, however, is more than opening the doors and letting The Other become one of us. Radical welcome is not an invitation to assimilate. Radical welcome not only accepts the differences of The Other, but celebrates them. Spellers describes it as an embrace. "Come, bring who you are." When we are both open, a new community and relationship emerges. Radical Welcome changes us. It requires us to be open to new ideas, traditions, and customs.

My parish sees itself as open and affirming to all. "A place where all are welcome at the table." But radical welcome not only invites people to the table, but into the kitchen. Come, show us your favorite dish. Show us how you set the table and decorate. Show us how to see God in new ways.

Friends of Jesus

2009-08-06T07:43:00.002-06:00

Thursday of Proper 13; Acts 19:11-20

(13)Then some itinerant Jewish exorcists tried to use the name of the Lord Jesus over those who had evil spirits, saying, 'I adjure you by the Jesus whom Paul proclaims.' (14)Seven sons of a Jewish high priest named Sceva were doing this. (15)But the evil spirit said to them in reply, 'Jesus I know, and Paul I know; but who are you?

In this passage we see seven men trying to do works in the name of Jesus, although they themselves were disciples of him. No reason given as to why; perhaps they wanted the fame and glory. Perhaps they wanted to be paid for the exorcism and saw this as a money making opportunity. In either case, they didn't do it because God called them. Basically they thought, "if it worked for Paul, it would work for me."

True, effective ministry comes out of a real relationship with God and Jesus. There is no faking that. Even the demons could sniff that one out. We may say the right words, do the right actions, but if we aren't in relationship then its all for show. There is a temptation to see another Christian's ministry and get jealous. Why even Paul's hankies healed people!

When we engage in ministry we have to remember to do it for the right reason, which is to serve the God with whom we have a relationship. Its not about power, show, money or prestige; its about living a life of faith.

If at first you don't succeed....

2009-08-04T07:44:00.003-06:00

Tuesday of Proper 13; Mark 8:22-33

23He took the blind man by the hand and led him out of the village; and when he had put saliva on his eyes and laid his hands on him, he asked him, 'Can you see anything?' 24And the man looked up and said, 'I can see people, but they look like trees, walking.' 25Then Jesus laid his hands on his eyes again; and he looked intently and his sight was restored, and he saw everything clearly.

This healing story is different from all the others. In this story it took Jesus two tries to accomplish the healing. I mean, Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead, but after laying hands on the blind man, he still couldn't see. Did Jesus think to himself, "Well, if at first you don't succeed, try again?"

This is a great passage to contemplate during those times when you are waiting for God's healing touch. We live in an instant age, so we want our miracles instantly as well. But what happens to our faith when God's healing is delayed? Its so easy to give God one shot and then run off to try something else.

I believe God wants us to be whole in body, mind and spirit. I also believe that sometimes that wholeness may take time or come in a way we don't imagine. When God seems to tarry in answering prayer, it may be that God is working in ways undetected to us.

This story is also an encouragement to keep praying. I know people who pray once and then let it go at that. For example, they may come to a healing service once and then go home and wait. I say if the church has a weekly healing service, be there every week and receive laying on of hands until the prayer is answered. Remember the parable of the bothersome neighbor? For what ever reason, God sometimes wants us to keep coming. Maybe that's part of the healing? Who knows? But its comforting to me that even the Son of God didn't get it right the first time.

Waiting on the promises

2009-07-24T08:36:00.002-06:00

Friday of Proper 11; Mark 5:21-43

In this passage we have the dual healing of Jairus' daughter and the women with the hemorrhage. Jesus was on his way to the home of Jairus to heal his daughter. On the way there a woman who had been hemorrhaging for twelve years touched Jesus' robes as he walked by. Jesus felt "the power go out from him" and stopped to find out what happened. As the conversation wrapped up and the group turned to continue their journey to Jairus' house, word came that they were too late and she had died.

I can imagine the emotions raging inside Jairus. Jesus was on his way to heal her, but this woman stopped them for her own healing. Did the delay cause her death? If the woman hadn't touched Jesus would they have made it in time to save his daughter? Questions probably popped into his head; "Why her and not me?" I'm sure the woman had her own questions. She had been praying for healing for twelve years.

In both cases, their prayers were answered, just not as they had hoped for or expected. They had to wait on God's promises. I've been in difficult situations wondering when God would get around to answering my prayers. It can seem like God is not interested. I think of Elijah and the test with the prophets of Baal. Maybe God "is musing, or he is relieving himself, or he is on a journey, or perhaps he is asleep and must be awakened."(ESV) In other words, "Get off the pot, God and answer my prayer!"

When we are in stressful times, it is hard to wait on God. But our faith is based on God's promises and God has not broken any yet. I pray for the strength to be faithful as God is faithful.

Proclaiming the Kingdom

2009-07-17T07:48:00.002-06:00

Friday of Proper 10; Mark 3:7-19a

And he appointed twelve, whom he also named apostles, to be with him, and to be sent out to proclaim the message. (vs 14)

Jesus called out twelve men from among his many followers and appointed them as his apostles. Here he calls them specifically to do the task of proclaiming the message. The message of Mark's Gospel is that the Kingdom of God is at hand.

I have been discussing congregational development with a church consultant friend of mine. He has been doing church work for 30 years and said to me, "Do you know how many clergy I meet who cannot describe the Kingdom of God? Almost all." He said after all, its hard to be a disciple if you cannot describe the teacher's teaching. OUCH. I immediately tried to see if I could describe God's Kingdom.

The Interpreter's Dictionary of the Bible says the Kingdom of God is where God's sovereignty is a "present reality whenever individuals acknowledge it by obedient submission to his will." For me, I described the Kingdom by what it looks like to me. Its about actively seeking God's presence,about being vulnerable, open, expectant and hopeful. Its not perfect, neat or orderly. I would say the Kingdom of God is a bit like being in Alice's wonderland; full of interesting people, some quite mad, with surprises and unexpected twists. Unlike Alice, we are just doing it in community.

What the Kingdom is not is perfect people living perfect lives. We don't live in the fullness of God's Kingdom yet. The Kingdom is saying, "Jesus is Lord," then trying to live like you mean it.

New Wineskins

2009-07-15T08:31:00.002-06:00

Wednesday of Proper 10; Mark 2:13-22

21 "No one sews a piece of unshrunk cloth on an old cloak; otherwise, the patch pulls away from it, the new from the old, and a worse tear is made. 22 And no one puts new wine into old wineskins; otherwise, the wine will burst the skins, and the wine is lost, and so are the skins; but one puts new wine into fresh wineskins."

This passage teaches us the difficulty in putting together the old and the new. When trying to compromise or "make do," the end result is the destruction of both. God calls us to be a new creation, not an altered edition of the old creation. Without a new heart, mind and attitude, we are just "trying on" our spirituality and that doesn't work. We need to be truly transformed.

This transformation is true both for the individual and for communities. I have come to belief that Congregational Development doesn't work. That is, it doesn't work unless a congregation is truly ready to die and be re-created. If all we do is try on new programs or worship or whatever, we are bound to fail. Its like putting new wine in old wineskins. Redevelopment only works when we can go to the cross, die to self and be resurrected with the power of the Holy Spirit.

Gnostic heresy

2009-07-13T12:04:00.002-06:00

I've been on vacation for the past two weeks, which is why I haven't blogged in some time. I'm back home and now I'm reading all the feeds from the General Convention in Anaheim. It seems our Presiding Bishop, Katherine Jefferts Schori is making waves with her opening address. In her address she stated that relying solely on one's personal relationship with Christ for salvation and counting on "the sinner's prayer" to save you is tantamount to idolatry. She actually used the "H" word; heresy. Christian Broadcast network (CBN) latched on to that one.

I've been reading Thomas G. Long's book, "Preaching from Memory to Hope", in which he states exactly the same premise. Gnosticism, that age old heresy, is about having special illumination and special knowledge (gnosis) that delivers the believer from damnation. Its the old, I'm in and your out belief system. Gnosticism insists on "individual autonomy, a search for personal freedom, a quest to find spiritual wisdom within, and a resistance to external structures of authority."

The "just me and Jesus" type of religion is not grounded in community. Its making the words and the private relationship into an idol. The Bible is about community. We are identified as God's people, not God's individuals. What +Jefferts Schori is saying is that it is in hanging together in the messiness of community that we see God's face. As soon as we disengage and think we have all the right answers (gnosis) we enter into idolatry. Her statement is radical, as in the sense of back to the basic. God came to save the whole world, not individuals.

St Alban

2009-06-22T08:03:00.002-06:00

St. Alban, first martyr of Britain; 1 John 3:13-16, Matthew 10:34-42, Psalm 34:1-8

"We ought to lay down our lives for one another." 1 John 3:16
"whoever gives even a cup of cold water to one of these little ones in the name of a disciple-- truly I tell you, none of these will lose their reward." Mt 10:42

The Gospel is not about doing good works to pay our way to heaven, its about being in right relationship. We are all connected, we are all part of the family of Adam. The creation story is not so much about 6 days and 2 people, its a story that brings home the point no matter how different we are, at the core we are one. Scripture teaches us about love, relationship and caring for each other. Love God, love each other. Its simple. Not easy, but simple.

The Widow's Mite

2009-06-18T08:34:00.002-06:00

Thursday of Proper 6; Luke 20:40- 21:4

'Truly I tell you, this poor widow has put in more than all of them; for all of them have contributed out of their abundance, but she out of her poverty has put in all she had to live on.' (vs 3,4)

The story of the widow's mite has become a basic stewardship tale. No matter how little we have, we are to give God our thank offering. This is true, but there is more to the story than just money.

This parable also is about those who are poor in spirit. When we face difficult times and our journey leads us through a dark night of the soul, its not easy to give God thanks. We say to ourselves, "What's to be thankful for? Where is God?" It is precisely in these times that we are to go to God in prayer and supplication.

When job prospects look grim, money is low, relationships are on the rocks or health is suffering a set-back, that is the time to thank God for what you do have. I know for me its easier to think of the negative things than it is to draw up a list of the good things.

When we are not spiritually strong and our faith is wavering, a simple prayer of thanks for a kind word is more pleasing to God than hours of prayer by a spiritual giant. Sometimes it is about quality and not quantity.

God is with us in all circumstances. Sometimes its hard for us to see it. The more we can be thankful for the little things, the more we will be able to see God in the world about us. Its about opening our eyes and seeing things in new ways. The rich men in the parable trusted in their own wealth, but not in God. The widow knew she had little to offer and relied totally on God.

Help us, Lord, to rely solely on you.

Saving Marriage

2009-06-17T14:21:00.002-06:00

We live in a world of sin and brokenness. No one is immune from the pain that life throws our way. Everyday people are hurt and wounded by those they love. Everyday someone is letting someone else down. In most cases in goes unnoticed, unless of course you are a public official or celebrity. It seems all to familiar a scenario, the politician admitting his sins while his wife stands by with that far off gaze. She always draws our attention away from the politician, which may be exactly what she is there to do.

Today we have yet another politician admitting his "mistake." This time, no wife by his side although he assures us that she has forgiven him. She issued a statement saying that their marriage "was stronger than ever." The fact that its played out on the TV doesn't make it any more tragic. Brokenness is brokenness whether there's film at 11 or not.

Another common thread these stories often bear is the fact the politician is a conservative fighting for the morals of society. Senator John Ensign of NV was a rising Republican who was in favor of a constitutional amendment to "protect" marriage from the homosexual agenda. In an article written in 2004, I found this,

After evaluating the idea of President Bush's recommendation of such an amendment Tuesday, Ensign said he believes it is necessary "to protect the institution of marriage in America."
"In order to defend the institution of marriage, uphold the rights of individual states and maintain the will of the people, I believe we are compelled to amend our country's Constitution," Ensign said.

Ensign also came out strongly to impeach President Clinton after he admitted he had an affair. "He has no credibility left," Ensign said at the time.

We all fall, we all sin and we are all saved by grace alone. I pray for the Ensign's. I also pray that those who fight to keep marriage off-limits to gay couples will rethink their stand. How can letting two people who love each other and want to commit themselves to each other but happen to be the same gender, destroy marriage while a "straight" affair between two married people strengthens marriage? I'm sorry, I just don't get it.

House of Prayer

2009-06-11T19:18:00.002-06:00

Friday of Proper 5, Luke 19:41-48

'My house shall be a house of prayer'

The money-changers in the temple were doing temple work. Offerings needed to be presented, and money needed to be changed. What happened, however, is that the business of the church shifted from prayer and worship to maintenance. The money-changers maintained the status quo and kept things going.

Jesus shows up and says the business of the church is not business, but worship. As the people of God, we are called to keep the main thing, the main thing. Prayer is what we are called to do as God's people. Prayer is the battery of the church, it empowers it, enables it, guides it and basically gives it life. Without prayer, the church is dead.

But prayer is not flashy and it doesn't get attention. Its quiet and unassuming and because of that, its often not seen as important. We measure success by programs, not deepened spirituality. When clergy sit and pray they are asked why aren't they "doing" something.

God values prayer above all things. So, shouldn't then church?

Sin & Self Esteem

2009-06-05T10:43:00.002-06:00

Friday of Proper 4; Luke 18:9-14

He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous and regarded others with contempt: (Lk 18:9)

The world says that what is wrong with humankind (and religion) is that we have such poor self-esteem. Growing up I learned that sometimes you win and sometimes you lose. Life is not always fair and those who do well prosper and those who fail do not. I didn't like failing or losing, so I tried hard to succeed and win. I was not an athlete, so on track and field day I knew I would come in last in the races. Would it have been nice to win? Sure.

In this day and age we can't have winners and losers. We all have to be winners in order to make sure our self-esteem is intact. Schools can't place value judgements on work and its becoming more important to feel good than to do good. In this climate, its hard to talk about sin and a need for a savior. We don't see ourselves as sinners, just broken people in need of recovery. I read recently that some hymnals are changing hymns to reflect this, for example, the words to "Amazing Grace" have been changed from "That saved a wretch like me" to "That saved and strengthened me."

When we trust in ourselves and our own righteousness, we miss the mark. We are all sinners and its only God's loving grace that can save us. Our worth comes not from the self, but from God who created us.

Rapture

2009-06-03T09:59:00.002-06:00

Wednesday of Proper 4, Luke 17:20-36

I tell you, on that night there will be two in one bed; one will be taken and the other left. There will be two women grinding meal together; one will be taken and the other left. (Lk 34,35)

I saw a bumper sticker that read, "In case of rapture, this car will be unmanned."
I read a better one that said, "In case of rapture, can I have you car?"

The whole "left behind" mentality has this image of the rapture where planes are left without pilots, empty clothes propped in chairs and general mayhem as half the world just disappears. I remember a Christian film that opened with someone bursting from the grave and flying up into the sky like superman. Quite startling and I'm afraid very laughable. I guess if you take this type of Scripture as literal, then that's what you believe will happen.

As I see it, Jesus is comparing his coming again to Noah and the ark and Lot and Sodom. Things will come unexpectedly and without much warning. Jesus is also saying the about half the world population will be affected. I don't think Jesus is describing just how that is going to happen. Its allegory, it will be like having the person next to you gone. It will be surprising and sudden and traumatic.

The main point for Jesus is, don't waste your time thinking about it. "Don't go running off into pursuit" Spend your time following the commandments to love the Lord your God and love your neighbor as yourself. Get about the work and when its time, Jesus will come back and say, "Well done, good and faithful servant."

2009-06-02T13:01:00.002-06:00

Tuesday, June 2; 2 Corinthians 6:3-13

What agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; as God said, "I will live in them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. Therefore come out from them, and be separate from them, says the Lord, and touch nothing unclean; then I will welcome you, and I will be your father, and you shall be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty."

Paul is writing to the church in Corinth, addressing a particular problem. Apparently there were Christians who were marrying non-Christians. Part of this passage is the admonition to not be "unequally yoked." Its the same law God sent to the Hebrew people living in Canaan; don't intermarry. Intermarriage of different religions apparently leads to the faithful turning from worshiping Yahweh alone. Our faith is no longer pure and true and we are seduced by "false" religion.

As a single Christian person, I have wrestled with the question of dating a unbeliever. I found I could not date someone opposed to religion, that was just a given. But I did date people who may have described themselves as "spiritual but not religious." None of those experiences went very far. I am lucky to be dating someone now who has a strong faith and attends church regularly. We are even attending an upcoming Labyrinth gathering together. It is so great to be in a relationship where you can share the most important aspect of life, a faith in God. It does make a difference. Would I ever forbid a Christian to date a nonbeliever? No. But I would say it makes a world of difference if you do.

I do have a little problem with the way this verse is phrased, however. It does seem as if Paul is placing a condition on God's love; IF you don't touch anything unclean or associate with non-believers, THEN you will be called God's sons and daughters. Um, what about unconditional love? And what about Jesus? He touched unclean things all the time; Gentiles, lepers, sinners, and all sorts of folks on the fringe. Aren't we called to be the hands of Jesus? If so, then we are called to embrace those whom the world will not embrace. We wouldn't have St. Damien the missionary to the Lepers in Hawaii or Theresa of Calcutta if we listened to Paul in this passage.

Hard as it is to understand, we are to be in the world but not of it. We are to get our hands dirty, but keep our hearts clean.

Like a Good Neighbor

2009-05-28T09:35:00.002-06:00

The Seventh Thursday in Easter; Luke 10:25-37

And who is my neighbor?

As a child of the television era, jingles and theme songs provide a sound track for life. "N-E-S, T-L-E, Nestle makes the very best, choooocolate." "Plop, plop, fizz, fizz, oh what a relief it is." And of course, "Like a Good Neighbor, State Farm is there."

The State Farm commercial assures us that no matter what tragedy befalls us, the friendly and caring State Farm agent will be there with more than a check, but with compassion and understanding. Today the concept of the good neighbor is almost as antiquated as the good Samaritan. We live in neighborhoods with garages in the front and decks hidden behind privacy walls in the back. You can live next door to people for years and hardly ever see them, let along get to really know them.

I grew up in a neighborhood where the kids all played together and the adults actually socialized. Parties, barbeques and over-the-fence conversations were the norm. We really did know our neighbors, and not just their names, but their hopes, dreams and difficulties.

This is the type of community the church is to offer. We are to care for one another and be involved in each other's lives. We are called to support one another. The Book of Common Prayer includes a community commitment in both the baptism liturgy and the wedding ceremony. "Will all of you in attendance commit to supporting this person in their life in Christ or these people in their marriage?" We help, we care, we show up.

And as the scripture proclaims, its not just those who attend our parish church. Everyone is our neighbor. We are called to care for each other on a more global level as well. Whether they are across town, the state, the nation or the world, we are bound to all people. Whatever we do for the least, we do for Christ.

St Augustine of Canterbury

2009-05-26T08:09:00.002-06:00

2 Corinthians 5:17-20a; Psalm 66:1-8; Luke 5:1-11

Augustine was the first Archbishop of Canterbury and baptized King Ethelbert, the first Christian king in England. Augustine is seen as the father of the Anglican church.

Pope Gregory the Great sent Augustine to England in 597 as a missionary to the Anglo-Saxons. Augustine was consecrated Bishop around 601 and named "Archbishop of the English Nation."

Some correspondence between Augustine and Gregory survives. Lesser Feasts and Fasts mentions one famous letter of council to Augustine:

If you have found customs, whether in the Roman, Gallican, or any other Churches that may be more acceptable to God, I wish you to make a careful selection of them, and teach the Church of the English, which is still young in the faith, whatever you can profitably learn from the various Churches. For things should not be loved for the sake of places, but places for the sake of good things.

This excerpt speaks about unity in diversity, a hallmark of Anglican spirituality, but also of those things which draw us into community. Do we love what happens at St. Paul's because we love the church? Or do we love the church because of the works God does through this community? I understand St. Augustine as saying the devotion to a place, church or community comes from seeing the fruit of God's love exhibited in those places. As we speak of evangelism and growing the church, I often hear members say they don't understand why more people don't come to their loving parish. St. Augustine would ask, "Do others see the good things flowing out of that community?" Make a difference in the world and others will notice and eventually come and join with you. Keep to yourself and the Good News is not proclaimed and the Kingdom is not expanded.

Ascension

2009-05-21T09:49:00.002-06:00

Ascension Day; Acts 1:1-11; Psalm 47; Ephesians 1:15-23; Luke 24:44-53

Why do you stand looking up toward heaven? (Acts 1:10)

Jesus makes it clear where our focus should be; the world. As the church it is so easy to become so focused on ourselves or on speculating how and when Jesus will return. Is it pre-millennial or post-millennial? Where will he descend? In Jerusalem? Or is it just symbolic?

When we focus on ourselves we spend time fighting over who's in or out of communion. We draw lines and takes sides. Jesus took sides too. He sided with the marginal, the outcast, the downtrodden, the sick and the sinner.

As I reflect more and more on Benedictine spirituality, I am constantly reminded that it is in and through daily life that we encounter God. God is in all things and speaks to us in all things. All we need do is open our eyes to see God at work in the world around us; as it says in Eucharistic Prayer C in the Book of Common Prayer.

Our gaze should not be at ourselves nor should it be focused on heaven. Our gaze is on the world, seeking ways in which to love and serve the Lord.

Anger

2009-05-19T14:05:00.002-06:00

The 6th Tuesday in Easter, James 1:16-27; Luke 11:1-13

And forgive us our sins, for we ourselves forgive everyone indebted to us. (Lk 11:4)
let everyone be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger (James 1:19); If any think they are religious, and do not bridle their tongues but deceive their hearts, their religion is worthless (James 1:26)

I find myself getting angry at the same people over and over again. I also see a pattern that I get angry about basically the same thing over and over. We all have buttons and it seems like the anger button is one of our more sensitive ones.

I find it is easier to keep anger in check when I spend more time listening than speaking. Take time, slow down, pray; all good things to do when its easier to jump to that defensive angry position. I also find its harder to be angry with someone if I've forgiven them. Praying for others helps disconnect that button they always seem to be able to push.

Astounding Grace

2009-05-15T10:23:00.002-06:00

Sixth Sunday of Easter, Year B, Acts 10:44-48

The circumcised believers who had come with Peter were astounded that the gift of the Holy Spirit had been poured out even on the Gentiles. (vs.45)

I'm sure "astounded" is a pretty mild description of how the old-line folks felt when the unclean Gentiles received the Holy Spirit. "WHAT! You've got to be kidding," is more like it. Astonishment, anger, disbelief, fear and numerous other emotions were most likely running through their heads. Their world had just been turned upside down. The people with whom they couldn't touch or even associate received the Holy Spirit in exactly the same way the Apostles received it. Gentiles were unclean and no different to a Jew than a leper. They were beyond the fringe, unless they became a proselyte and conformed to all the Jewish law.

But in this case there was not even the admonition to "repent and be baptised." No repentance, no conformity, no conditions; God just anointed them. So to say the old-school Christians were astounded is an understatement.

We know that we seek God because God first calls us, so whenever someone comes seeking God its because God is calling them. We can't, therefore, turn them away or require they change to meet our expectations. I know many people who have a sense of God and are looking for meaning and spirituality but who have been so hurt by the judgementalism of the church that they have walked away. God calls whom God wills and as Peter says, "Who are we to keep them out."

Soil, Wisdom and Love

2009-05-12T14:48:00.003-06:00

The Fifth Tuesday in Easter; Wisdom 10:1-21; Romans 12:1-21; Luke 8:1-15

Wisdom would be a good thing to have right about now. As life's drama encircles me I am struggling to be wise, loving and Christ-like. "Love one another with zeal" even those who lash out against you.

I love the Luken passage. I even know a group massage that goes along with it. It reassures me that my only job is to preach, sow the seeds of the Gospel. I don't need to be concerned where it lands or how it grows. That's up to God.

Recently someone used this parable against me. There is an issue that someone and I don't see eye to eye on. Because I do not agree with their theology, I was told that I was bad soil. They, after all, were sending out the true word of God and I was not receiving it. The problem, obviously, must be with me.

I have a different theological perspective so therefore I am "wrong." But who is to say who is "wrong?" How easy is it to use proof-texts or snippets of Scripture taken out of context to convince others into believing what we believe? The church used to burn heretics, but now some of those vary same people are saints in the church. How many of the reformers that died to bring out the Reformation are now saints?

That's extreme, I know. I don't think I'm a heretic and certainly don't want to encourage apostasy, but how can we have different interpretations without vilifying each other? This is where Wisdom comes in. Are we listening, praying, discerning? Or are we just trying to get our way and using God as a really big club?

Seeking Wisdom

2009-05-08T08:58:00.002-06:00

The Fourth Friday in Easter, Wisdom 6:12-23; Colossians 3:1-11; Luke 7:1-17

The beginning of wisdom is the most sincere desire for instruction, and concern for instruction is love of her. (Wisdom 6:17)

If then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ is, sitting at the right hand of God. Set your mind on things above, not on things on the earth. (Col 3:1,2)

Sometimes I think Wisdom is a lost virtue; like civility which has given way to expediency or statesmanship that has given way to politics. As I listen to the news, both so-called liberal and conservative, I see the nation calling out for ideologies and solutions amid tons of rhetoric. What I don't see too much of are people seeking true wisdom.

Wisdom has always been talked about as what you gain as you mature. The image is that of the wise man or woman who speaks softly and distinctly. Wisdom does not give a quick and easy response. Wisdom weighs all things and speaks of the human condition. Wisdom does not take sides, wisdom provides balance. And, as the writer of Wisdom says, wisdom begins with the desire for instruction. The wise say, "Show me new ways. Teach me new understanding." The foolish say, "I have the answer. Let's do it my way."

I find my struggle is to quiet my own voice and listen to the other voices God sends me; scripture, prayers, hymns, spiritual reading, and importantly, other people. My prayer is to see all things as lessons in wisdom. We can go through life blindly, or we can go through life learning every step of the way.

Joining the tribe

2009-05-07T09:11:00.003-06:00

Thursday in the 4th week of Easter
Wisdom 5:9-23; Col. 2:8-23; Luke 6:39-49

"Why do you call me 'Lord, Lord," and do not do what I tell you?" (Luke 6:46)

In my last blog entry I noted that I used to take the week after Easter off. I may not have taken off work, but I did take time off blogging. Thanks to all of those who sent me notes urging me to begin writing again.

This passage from Luke has a lot of pithy and well known sayings about; "the blind leading the blind," "take the log out of your own eye," "build your house on the rock." There is also the garden imagery that mirrors much of what is in the Sunday Gospel.

What struck me this morning, however, was the passage above. I'm reading "Inhabiting the Church." The book is a look at the new monasticism coming out of the emerging church movement. The author quotes an essay by John Alexander called "Apache Document."

Suppose a white person went to Arizona for a weekend and came back saying he'd become an Apache. He still talked the same, he still lived the same place, he still related to nature the same way, he still talked to everyone he saw, and he didn't spend much time with Apaches. The only change you could see was that he wore buckskin Sunday mornings and went around telling people he'd become an Apache. What would you think? I'd think it was odd. I'd suspect he hadn't joined the Apache tribe in any meaningful sense.

Alexander relates becoming a Christian to joining a tribe. It takes more than wearing the clothes; in the Christian's case it would be Christian T-shirts, fish symbols on your car and designer crosses around your neck. It means living the culture of the tribe. For us it means living a culture of love, openness, forgiveness and self sacrifice.

Not loving our neighbor as your self, harboring ill feelings, withdrawal from community, holding back; all these things are not doing what our Lord asks of us. How can we call him "Lord, Lord," and not love one another? Jesus says, we can't.

Walk in the Light

2009-04-21T12:57:00.002-06:00

Tuesday in the 2nd Week of Easter , 1 John 2:1-11

Whoever says "I am in the light," while hating a brother or sister, is still in darkness. Whoever loves a brother or sister lives in the light, and in such a person there is no cause for stumbling. (9,10)

To live in Christ means to be serious about loving. All resentment, hard feelings and petty irritations must be forgotten. Even though we may say we don't "hate" anyone, Christ reminds us that even name calling, "fool," is like murder. The things we do that put others down or demean them is no different than hating them.

Where does our anger and hatred come from? Most often it comes from our own sinful pride. "How could they treat me like that? I deserve better." Do we now? Our faith tells us we are to humble ourselves and think of others more highly than ourselves. We are not to grab the best seats or the places of honor. We are to be lowly servants, slaves, even. How then can we be angry when our work is not praised as it should be, or when someone gets ahead of us in line, or when we don't get credit for that new idea at work? Christ says we are not to get angry. We are to offer up our gifts of time and talent for the greater good.

Next time you feel slighted or angry, stop and look at where you are walking. I'll guarantee its not in the light.

Glorifying God

2009-04-20T12:49:00.002-06:00

Monday in the 2nd Week of Easter, John 17:1-11

Holy Week and Easter Sunday are over. In past years I would have taken a week's vacation, but this year I took time off before Lent. After Easter the pace didn't seem to let up. There was the newsletter to be written, I started a newcomer's class and I had play rehearsals. Still busy.

Today's lesson is all about Christ's glorification. God glorified Christ in the world and in his disciples. Makes me think how I am glorifying Christ this Easter season. Being tired, stressed out and slightly overworked does not glorify Christ. Perhaps just the opposite. If I'm not shining with the resurrected Christ, am I doing more harm than good? Is it better to slow down and breath in the Holy Spirit and let God do the glorifying? I think so. When I try to do it on my strength and with my gifts, it falls short of the glory of God. When I get out of the way and let God use me, then things begin to happen.

Time for me to get out of the way. Just like Peter, Jesus is saying to me, "Get behind me Satan for you are a hindrance to my work."

Transformation

2009-04-06T07:55:00.002-06:00

Monday of Holy Week, the frog of Salamanca

It just never occurred to be to use the frog as a symbol of transformation, but indeed it is. From tadpole to frog is quite a transformation. Holtz writes from Salamanca, Spain where the frog is the town's unofficial mascot. The frog is found on a facade at the University of Salamanca that depicts the transformation students go through during their life at the university.

Transformation is what Christianity is all about. The old creature is gone and the new is born. We enter the waters of baptism to drown and emerge onto the bank a new creation. Holtz writes, "Jesus never challenges me to be a better Christian, never asks me to improve, to become holier or more saintly. He never asks me to grow. he simply keeps asking me to be transformed -- to die."

In order to be transformed and die to self I have to be like Christ and let go of everything and pick up my cross and follow Him. Its not easy to let go of my thoughts, my ideas, my hopes and dreams, but the cross is not meant to be easy. I find it comforting, however, that I don't have to keep trying to be better. I just let go and let God bring out the transformation God wishes to see in me.

Hoping No Matter What

2009-04-04T14:55:00.002-07:00

That's the name of the meditation for Friday in the Fifth Week of Lent. Holtz is writing from Amsterdam at the hiding place of Anne Frank.

Holtz writes, "Our earthly pilgrimage, like Jesus', includes suffering and even death, but our faith assures us that human suffering, far from being an absurd accident, is somehow an integral part of our own story, just as it was of Christ's." He asks if our suffering draws us closer to the Lord or pushes us away.

It is interesting that I read this passage today. (I've been down with bronchitis and am a bit off in my daily readings.) I just sent off a letter to someone important in my life who has suffered through a great deal recently. It seems like this person never gets a break, its always one thing after another. I must admit, its hard not to ask "why?"

The answer can always be, "why not?" Being Christian does not make us immune to suffering. God does not give us a free ticket when we are baptised. What God does give us is assurance that God is always with us. We can choose to be victims and complain, or, we can choose to be faithful and turn our eyes to God. I know its not easy. I know I'm terrible at suffering. But whether its easy or not or whether I like it or not, its true. In the midst of the hell of Nazi occupied Amsterdam, Anne Frank chose to believe. She wrote, "In spite of everything, I still believe that people are really good at heart. If I look up to the heavens, I think that this will all come right."

Take heart, Jesus is Emmanuel, "God with us."

On being a Benedictine Community

2009-03-27T14:26:00.002-07:00

I'm reading Pilgrim Road for my Lenten devotional reading. For my church reading I'm just starting New Monasticism by Jonathan Wilson-Hartgrove.

Today in Road, the meditation is on gratitude and thankfulness to God. Holtz said that oftentimes pilgrimages were made as a thank offering to God. To honor God and show our gratitude, people would travel to a shrine or holy place to show God their love. The sense being, "If God did all this for me, the least I could do is walk over and say hi." Well, more or less.

In New Monasticism, the local church community is the modern expression of an ancient monastery. Although the members may not, but in some cases do, share living space, the parish can be a Benedictine Community in all aspects. In a sense, our stewardship of time and money given to the local parish is our thank offering to God. God has given so much, the least we can do is show up and give God praise and honor.

Although it may just be a ten minute drive by car, how could our coming to the local parish church be, in fact, a pilgrimage? It may become a destination for you at other times than Sunday morning, or choir practice. It might just be a place you go to sit and pray, be quiet, do acts of charity and kindness, feed the poor, heal the broken, practice peace. What if we go, not to do our duty, but to love God? What changes there could be!

Welcoming the Guest

2009-03-24T14:18:00.002-07:00

"All humility should be shown in addressing a guest on arrival or departure. By a bow of the head or by a complete prostration of the body, Christ is to be adored because he is indeed welcomed in them." Rule of Benedict (Chap 53, "The Reception of Guests," vv.6-7)

What if our churches were more like Benedictine communities? Then every person who enters our doors is to be treated as Christ himself. Not just the parishioners, but the the guests and visitors as well. And not just those who visit on a Sunday morning when the official "Greeters" are on duty, but every day when ever someone sets foot in the door.

This means the AA group, Weight Watchers, the local LGBT group that meets in our space, the HIV support group and those who come to our Community Kitchen twice a week for a free meal. All of them are to be treated as Christ. How do we treat the UPS driver, mail carrier, electrical worker, plumber, air conditioning repair person and cleaning person who comes among us? I'm not sure how different things would be. Maybe not much at all, but then again, maybe there are ways we can engage everyone on a different level. How differently would these people go out into the world if they truly felt that special every time they came to our church? I don't have the answers. Maybe its time to experiment.

God in all things

2009-03-23T07:27:00.002-07:00

Monday in the 4th Week of Lent John 6:1-15

One of his disciples, Andrew, Simon Peter's brother, said to him, "There is a boy here who has five barley loaves and two fish. But what are they among so many people?" Jesus said, "Make the people sit down." Now there was a great deal of grass in the place; so they sat down, about five thousand in all. Then Jesus took the loaves, and when he had given thanks, he distributed them to those who were seated; so also the fish, as much as they wanted. (8-11)

A hot day, a crowd of thousands and a boy with a sack lunch. Put them together and what do you get? A miracle of course. That is when the Son of God is around.

There's been much debate whether there was an actual multiplication of the loaves or if the boy's act of generosity sparked everyone to open up their bags to share. I believe the point is really, we offer our gifts to God, God blesses them, and the world is fed. Its the Eucharist; offer, bless, break, distribute.

In Pilgrim Road for today, Holtz wrote about seeing God in the world around us. Benedict says, "be always mindful of the presence of God." I think of what our churches would be like if we truly lived out of this Benedictine rule. What if all who came through our doors, parishioners, visitors, those who simply use our buildings for meetings; what if we looked at each person as the boy with the sack lunch? What gifts could God bless? How could our churches feed the world.
What if our churches were more like monasteries? Not as we see them today, as retreats away from the world, but as they used to be throughout history, lively centers of education, the arts and spirituality that acted as Communion for a hungry world. By seeing God in all things, we become a people who are offered, blessed, broken and sent out.

Stresses

2009-03-19T12:28:00.004-07:00

Thursday in the Lent III

Today is also the Feast of St. Joseph, earthly father of our Lord. In reading the lessons from both lectionaries, I have to admit I didn't find anything that spoke to me today. The chapter for today in Pilgrim Road was on separating our spiritual lives from our "real" lives. Holtz encouraged us in the meditation to see God in all the details of our life.

For me today was a day to face all the stresses that have been adding up in my life. I just passed the one year anniversary of my move to Indiana and as milestones are meant to do, that brings to the surface lots of emotions. That coupled with the serious health condition of my ex-wife and the burden that is placing on our daughters makes for a lot of stuff left unattended.

When emotions are not dealt with, they come out in other areas. I've found myself getting upset recently over things that should not be of that much concern. In meetings I find myself reacting when others on the team don't do what they committed to do. I'm finding myself unable to deal with bureaucracy and find the systems that requires them to be frustrating. The important thing for me to remember is that these are just the presenting symptoms. the dis-ease lies elsewhere.

Loss, frustration, my inability to control my world; these are the inner demons for me this Lent. This is what I offer to the cross. It is in these daily frustrations that I need to look for God. To help us look for God,Holtz gave this scripture for today's meditation, "The word is near you, on your lips and in your heart." (Rom 10:8)

Balance

2009-03-18T11:25:00.002-07:00

While on vacation I attended a church that had a laid-back and humorous style. The priest was light-hearted and playful in his sermon and that extended into the announcements, and indeed, extended to the congregation. During announcements it almost became like a comedy club, with the celebrant being the comic and the congregation his heckling audience. What started out as warm and friendly soon felt to me as uncomfortable. Where was the mystery and holiness?

I really started to think about this because this pastor's style was not unlike my own. My services are also relaxed, informal and sometimes interactive. "Wow," I thought to myself, "do I come across like this?" Is everything a joke? Do I cut out the sacred holiness of God? I remember my high school girlfriend. I thought I was in love and she was leaving to go off to the state university. "What about us?" I asked. Her reply, "Oh, Rick. Everything is a joke with you. How could anyone be in a serious relationship with you?" Ouch.

Humor can build bridges. It can lighten a situation and draw people closer together in shared laughter. Humor can also build walls. A good way to hide your true self and keep from being vulnerable is to be the clown. My theme song seemed to be "Be A Clown" from the musical "Singing in the Rain." Through the years I've grown, been broken and gotten up again. I know that being true to yourself, being vulnerable and open to others, is the true way to God.

Laughter is the best medicine there is. But, we shouldn't over-medicate. Use it wisely, as St. Benedict says. The word Holtz uses in Pilgrim Road is spoudogeloios. It's classical Greek and combines spoudos, "serious, earnest," and gelein, "to laugh." Holtz says, "For the ancient Greeks, the ideal person is one who is poised between the earnest and the playful, who travels through life with the evenness of spirit that comes from balancing heaviness with lightness."

Dear Lord, I pray that I can keep the balance between heavy and light. I pray that all that I do points to you and to myself. I pray that I may take you seriously, but myself lightly. In Jesus' name, Amen.

Listening

2009-03-17T14:37:00.002-07:00

Tuesday in the Third Week of Lent

Once again I have failed in my discipline. Work, busyness and the pressure of what's immanent push back what is essential. Rushing to meetings and making deadlines became more important than quiet and prayer. I say "more important" because we prove what's important to us more by our actions than our words.

How can I listen to God if I don't stop running around and simply shut up? God's wonderful sense of humor and timing got me again as I returned to my Lenten reading and came upon the chapter on Listening. Holtz reminds us that the very first word in Benedict's Rule is, "listen." That reminded me of the Shema; the passage from Deuteronomy that is the beginning of Jewish morning and evening prayers, the very foundation of Jewish spirituality:

Sh'ma Yis'ra'eil Adonai Eloheinu Adonai echad.
Hear, O Israel, the Lord is our God, the Lord is One.

Listen. Its the first thing we are called to do. Not pray, not work, not DO. Simply listen. Listen to God. Listen to the Holy Spirit fluttering inside of us.

Dear Lord, I pray that for the rest of Lent and indeed for the rest of my life, I can attune my heart to your Word and listen. I pray that the distractions and the busyness of life don't deafen me to your Spirit. Speak for here I am, Lord. Your servant is listening.

Receiving Guests

2009-03-11T13:43:00.002-07:00

Taken from Tuesday of the Second Week of Lent

(Rule of St. Benedict, Chapter 53, "The Reception of Guests." vv.3-5)
"Once a guest has been announced, the superior and the brothers are to meet him with all the courtesy of love. First of all, they are to pray together and thus be united in peace, but prayer must always precede the kiss of peace because of the delusions of the devil."

How often, upon meeting someone, do we engage in prayer? I can't recall ever doing it. I'm sure it would be very odd when you are introduced and reach out to shake hands, you hold on tight and say, "Let us pray." Pretty soon you won't be getting many introductions.

Even though we may not bow our heads and say a prayer together, I can still bathe each new introduction in prayer. As I'm learning your name and reaching out my hand, I can easily turn that time into prayer. "Rick, I'd like you to meet Joe." As I smile and extend my hand to prove I don't have any weapons, I can pray, "God, bless Joe, bless this meeting. Oh, and also help me remember his name cause we both know how hard that is for me."

This little prayer may not make a huge difference in my life and relationships, but you never know. It couldn't hurt.

Grumbling

2009-03-09T07:37:00.002-07:00

Monday in Lent II

I titled my blog Wilderness Thoughts because I see my journey as similar to the Exodus; following God, not always knowing what's next, screwing up, repenting, signs and wonders. You get the idea. Of course I like it when I can compare myself to Moses. Yeah, he wasn't perfect, but he does seem to be the hero in the story. What I find more often than not, however, is that I'm more like the Israelites than I am like Moses. I fall away, I grumble, I want an easier path.

Our Benedictine Way group at church is reading St. Benedict's Toolbox and we've been covering chapters on grumbling. Saturday's reading in Pilgrim's Road was also about grumbling. Holtz writes, "He (Benedict) strictly forbids grumbling, and often recommends some course of action so that no one be saddened in the house of God or that no one be given a justifiable reason for complaint." The message is clear, "stop the grumbling, its not all about you."

Its hard to find God in the present moment if we spend our time grumbling about our life. Whether you call it grumbling, murmuring or perhaps whining, it all boils down to the fact that things aren't going the way we like. It would be so much better if things just went the way I wanted or liked, wouldn't they? Or, maybe not. By opening ourselves up to others, to new ideas and situations, we open ourselves up to God and the Holy Spirit.

The sign post in the wilderness: Be Open. Stop Whining. It's not all about You!

Breaking down walls

2009-03-06T16:28:00.002-07:00

Friday in the First Week of Lent

In Pilgrim Road, Holtz takes us to Berlin. His reflections looks at the walls we erect to separate us from one another and God.

Whenever we separate our selves, cut people off, or refuse to associate with one another; we are separating ourselves from God. When I refuse to speak or associate with another human being, I am refusing to engage the Christ in them and I am refusing to be Christ to them.

Several weeks ago I visited my mother. Every time I visit her I swear its my last. She is a hurtful and hurting woman. She drives people away and alienates everyone she encounters. Her granddaughter, my niece, said she's done helping out.

But building a wall between us would be building a wall between me and God. This does not mean I allow her to abuse me. This does not mean I need to stay with her when I visit. Anyone who is around my mother needs to have good boundaries. God does not want us to be abused. But there are ways to protect myself and to still be Christ-like. I cannot treat her less than human, not because she's my mother, but because God is our father.

Jesus tells us to love everyone and to pray for our enemies. Not all enemies are from outside. Some come from the people closest to us. The call is clear. No walls, forgive, love all.

Unfinshed Business

2009-03-03T11:55:00.002-07:00

Tuesday in the First Week of Lent

In his Lenten journey, Holtz brings us to Dieppe, France and tells of the unfinished church. He describes a church with two finished, rounded columns and twelve unfinished columns. They ran out of money after the first two and left the others rough and unrounded.

Holtz reflects on how we are unfinished, never quite perfect. Life has a way of polishing us, rounding out the sharp corners and smoothing us out. This polishing requires grit and friction. The grit is the small particles of sand that literally knock away at the rough edges. As you polish stones, you start with a course grit and at each step use a finer grind, until at the very last polishing when it is as fine as sand. If you don't polish rocks, then you might be familiar with sandpaper; there is course, medium and fine. Eventually you give up the sandpaper and use steel wool to get that final smooth finish. The friction is how much pressure is applied to the rubbing together of rock and grit.

In our lives, the grit are those things that rub up against us; people, ideas and situations. The pressure comes from how much force the other exerts upon us. Each person we meet, each new encounter, every new learning experience changes us. How much it changes us depends on how much pressure there is. Do we engage it fully? Do we allow it to get close to us? Perhaps we have no choice and the experience itself comes at us with an irresistible force that makes us change.

We will always remain unfinished this side of heaven, but we can be part of our own polishing. We can open our eyes and minds and hearts to allow the world to change us. We can embrace the difficult times knowing that we will come out the other side closer to God. We may begin as diamonds in the rough, but through God's grace we are cut and polished into the finest of diamonds.

Low Tide

2009-03-02T15:36:00.002-07:00

Monday in the First Week in Lent

Today's meditation finds Holtz in the coastal town of Muros, Spain. He describes the scene of waking up and finding the bay at low tide. No lapping waves, only "ugly mud and wet sand." It may be unattractive, but the low tide allows the clam diggers and mussel farmers to collect their catch. It also gives the town a way to clean up from an earlier oil spill Holtz relates how the "low tides" in our lives allows us to do some clean up work and harvesting.

We dont like "low tides" and wilderness times, but God builds them into creation in order for us to renew ourselves. Fallow ground, the rebirth of a forrest after a fire; all are ways to start over. Its not easy and often we wish we could avoid it, but starting over is part of life. Its called spring, rebirth, renewal or Easter

Start with Love

2009-02-28T19:16:00.002-07:00

Saturday after Ash Wednesday

I didn't get to blog yesterday and now it late Saturday evening. I had out of town company and a vestry retreat all day today. I'm pooped.

Today's reading in "Pilgrim Road" is about St. Vincent de Paul. All I basically knew of St. Vince was that he had a chain of thrift stores, sort of like the Salvation Army. Okay, he didn't establish thrift store, his ministry was to the poor. The modern day Society of St. Vincent De Paul does run thrift stores to help their ministry.

St. Vincent was born in 1581 and devoted himself to ministry to the poor. He establish an Order of monks dedicated to this work. The basis for his work was his deep spiritual life. He believed you first start with the interior life and then let that lead you into ministry in the world. "You must start by establishing the kingdom of God in yourself first, and only then in other people." Although he was grounded in contemplative spirituality, Vincent believed in the "indispensable priority of action." Contemplation without action was unfathomable to him. In this regard he reminds me of Richard Rohr and his Center for Action and Contemplation.

As I've been working with redevelopment in my parish, I state over and over. We can't grow bigger until we grow deeper. Vincent said it best, "Start with love." Love is both a guiding principle and an action. First connect with God, then connect with one another in community, and then connect to the world.